Today, my friend's dad had a heart attack. Without realizing what I was saying, I texted her, "If you need anything, you know I'll be there in a heartbeat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was texting a friend of mine. She mentioned it was her dad's birthday. I typed, "Tell him 'Happy Birthday' from me!" and as I pressed send, I remembered her dad was dead. FML
Today, I texted a friend offering my condolences over the death of his grandfather. He hadn't been told his grandfather had died yet. FML
Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML
Today, I received a text from my dad, which was borderline-incomprehensible due to an insane amount of text language. I replied, jokingly asked if he had a stroke while writing it. A few seconds after hitting send, I remembered the stroke he suffered last month. FML
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Today, I texted my sister to ask her if she was OK after finding out that one of her oldest friends had died. She didn’t know. FML
Today, I texted a friend saying I urgently needed his help. He gushed back along the lines of, "Glad you reached out, everyone has noticed your terrible frame of mind, you’re a suicide risk." I meant help with a tricky Excel spreadsheet, but thanks for the support I guess. FML
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
Today, I work at a hospice center. At 3AM, a call just went out to a man's family to come because he was dying. I didn't realize that this man was my old friend's grandpa. When I saw her, I smiled really big and said, "Hey! Great to see you!" Her grandpa was ACTIVELY DYING. Stupid stupid stupid. FML
Today, I called my mom to let her know that my father, her ex-husband, suffered a series of mini strokes. Her reply was essentially, "Oh that sucks. Are you still taking your grandmother to lunch sometime this week?" Dad lives halfway across the country. FML
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Top comments
gusgus36 5
they know you mean well.. they might not have even noticed that you said heartbeat. don't beat yourself up over it
perdix 31
Well, if her dad is the official timekeeper, you might never show up.
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Comments (96)
Captain0bv10us 0
Don't worry! You weren't making fun of them or anything. Just an unlucky choice of words :)
aliadnan708 6
I'm sure she knows wat u meant n she won't be mad
perdix 31
Well, if her dad is the official timekeeper, you might never show up.
tdrtnlz 7
That's a pretty heartless thing to say.
seeunexttuesdays 6
And stupid
SoccerRebel594 0
It clearly was not stupid, fore he got many numerous thumbs ups :)
kialuvsyoo 3
Wow, why did this get voted up? Apparently this guy isn't alone in being a jerk.
perdix 31
Because it's funny. I'm not sure whether tdrtnlz was berating me or riffing off the theme of the original post.
geeksaresexy 18
It's just an unfortunate choice of words.. If she even noticed I bet she knows what you meant and won't be upset or mad at you. I once asked a guy with no hands if he'd like a hand with something, he didn't even notice what I'd said.. And no, I don't know why he had no hands...
teh_uber_muffin 3
Your fault for choosing those words? Hell yeah, it is.
BOOSCAREDU 0
Not really. It was just a slip of the mind.
MaskedAspen 6
it's the thought that counts !
qtip14 0
U obviously made this one up because nobody says that. But its still good
ShyAnn29 15
It was just saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, I'm sure she won't be mad about that
Deathhound 27
I think your friend will know, that you didn't to this on purpose.
hanj0b 0
I don't think this is very messed up; that comment is used in a lot of situations and your friend should know you intended it to be a serious/kind gesture. I wouldn't worry about it, but if it really freaked you out that much, think before you speak next time. ;)