By ShortieRose

Always proofread before sending

Today, I was texting with my close friend about her very sick father. She texted, "I hope he gets better" and I replied, "I hope he does." Autocorrect changed it to, "I hope he dies." FML

I agree, your life sucks

1967

You deserved it

389

Favorite

Family values

Dangling modifier

Wait, what?

By haha - United States

Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36387

You deserved it

3416

Favorite

By Monty - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was just wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and um...stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks

89333

You deserved it

15567

Favorite

By RKE - United States

Today, I went to our school golf banquet, after being with the team and practicing every day for a few months with them. When it came time to get the certificates, all the names were called out. Except for mine. When I asked the coach where my certificate was, he said "Who are you?". FML

I agree, your life sucks

35493

You deserved it

3304

Favorite

By Anonymous - Serbia - Beograd

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50627

You deserved it

4366

Favorite

By whatabitch - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend's mother came up to me at school, yelling and causing a scene in front of everyone for breaking her son's heart. We broke up over a year ago because he was cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40534

You deserved it

2566

Favorite

By _Oblivion_ - United States

Today, I fractured my finger setting up a rat trap. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22765

You deserved it

13570

Favorite

By JakeHolmes - United States

Today, I was in my hot tub with my brand new phone. I set it down and when I grabbed my towel I knocked it into the water. I quickly snatched it up and dried it off with the towel and suprisingly only one button stopped working. It was the unlock button, a perfectly good phone that I can't use. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8856

You deserved it

47759

Favorite

By supervisor - United States

Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML

I agree, your life sucks

32771

You deserved it

18127

Favorite

By Anonymous - Israel

Today, the girl who I was in love with for almost seven years listed me on facebook as her "Brother." FML

I agree, your life sucks

37945

You deserved it

6424

Favorite

By TatooFAIL - United States

Today, I found out that the phrase I got tattooed on my lower back is misspelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16245

You deserved it

67651

Favorite

By { o } - United States - Miami

Today, an old man approached me at work. I smiled and asked, "Hi, can I help you"? He looked at me for a few seconds before replying, "Fuck me, you need to lose some weight!" and then wandering off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30455

You deserved it

3694

Favorite

By missmom83 - United States - Torrington

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40997

You deserved it

5461

Favorite

By LosTits - United States

Today, I saw my boyfriend after not seeing him for 7 months. During this time I have lost a lot of weight and am proud of it. My boyfriend didn't say anything about the lost weight. When we were alone and things started to heat up, he took off my bra and said "I think your tits are smaller." FML

I agree, your life sucks

53664

You deserved it

5230

Favorite

By .... - Canada

Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28378

You deserved it

4171

Favorite

He prefers the dog

Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1857

You deserved it

331

Favorite

By JDLAX1924 - United States

Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26724

You deserved it

42249

Favorite

By officekid

Today, a woman from my office called, asking who was in. Only one other woman was in the office. I couldn't remember her name, so I had to awkwardly guess random names while both women listened, obviously aware of what was going on. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1179

You deserved it

609

Favorite

By MsConfusedd - United States - Hazlet

Today, I learned that my 76 year old great aunt likes to swim naked, even when I have friends over. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25657

You deserved it

2012

Favorite

By bongoboy - United States

Today, I had to go visit my grandma. While in her bathroom, the floss I was using cut my gum, I then proceded to make sounds of slight pain. My grandma was, at the same moment, walking by and said "Don't masturbate in side of my bathroom you sick teen!" Now my grandma thinks I am a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56240

You deserved it

6206

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

I agree, your life sucks

86546

You deserved it

5484

Favorite

By GMD - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51147

You deserved it

7173

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28891

You deserved it

9017

Favorite

By ER1C - Canada

Whoops

Today, as I was walking my dog around the block, I fell in the splits position on wet dirt and ripped my pants right on the front. I then had to walk home casually holding a chihuahua on my crotch hoping I would not run into anyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13385

You deserved it

1192

Favorite

By Dopeydancer - United Kingdom

Today, after a few drinks with some mates at a bar, we were invited to the dancefloor with some girls. After some dancing and flirting, I felt a cheeky squeeze on my backside, and so I quickly returned the favour without looking back. A few minutes later at the bar, I realised my wallet was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36120

You deserved it

13002

Favorite

By DesDri - Canada

Today, I drove a drunk Venezuelan exchange student home after a prom party. Notable events: her puking on the way to the vehicle, her yelling in Spanish at the top of her lungs in the car, her puking out the window in the moving vehicle, and her crying because she felt bad for making me drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45410

You deserved it

4914

Favorite

By öKANEö - United States - San Marcos

Today, during class, a student began arguing with my Algebra II teacher about whether or not water is wet. The student became so frustrated he threw a stapler across the room. Guess who got hit in the head and is currently bleeding pints in the nurse's office. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4705

You deserved it

247

Favorite

By mike - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she carved her old boyfriends name in her arm and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45383

You deserved it

4103

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned that if I don't clean out the litter box everyday, my cat will resort to shitting in the laundry basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13846

You deserved it

34851

Favorite

By Farmgirl

Today, during harvest, I got out of my tractor and promptly fell down the stairs, peed my pants, and stepped ankle deep in a mud hole. I sat in wet pants for the next two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3102

You deserved it

371

Favorite

By Anonymous - 5/6/2020 17:00

It's called fashion Dave, look it up!

Today, my beautiful bride walked towards me in a dress that looked just like a ribbed condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1432

You deserved it

250

Favorite

By hoser - Canada

Today, I went skiing. Trying to show off to some inexperienced skiers, I flew past them at my top speed, a bracket snapped off my boot and I slid on my face for about 30 metres. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8691

You deserved it

37021

Favorite

By Anonymous

Today, I woke up at 7, got to college by 7:40 to receive an email that my 8:00 a.m. class got cancelled. I stayed there until 12:00 p.m. for my second class, to then find out that the cancelled class was the one at 12:00, not 8:00. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23655

You deserved it

5843

Favorite

By Anonymous - Canada - Victoria

Today, I was confiding in my grandma about how lonely I am and how everything in my life seems to be falling apart. While I was in mid-sentence, she rolled her eyes and made a show of removing her hearing aid. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22785

You deserved it

3202

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me that he will never marry me because we are different ethnicities and his parents don't approve. I was of course very upset and crying. His way to comfort me was by saying, "Don't worry, I will always cheat on my wife with you." FML

I agree, your life sucks

46758

You deserved it

3698

Favorite

By frankfukhergood - Canada

Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to see a movie. He said he was busy that day, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me is making out and kicking my seat. I turn around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML

I agree, your life sucks

55956

You deserved it

3325

Favorite

By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while at work, I cringed as I noticed my caveman colleague frantically digging into his nose and then continuing the use of his computer. I work in IT support and will be rebuilding his computer and reinstalling all his applications in 30 minutes time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25528

You deserved it

2351

Favorite

By nikkei

Bullet = Dodged

Today, while paying for dinner, my card declined and my date immediately left. The waitress then ran my card again successfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3123

You deserved it

197

Favorite

By notthenaughtymaid - United States - Cedar Bluff

Today, I posted an ad online for house cleaning services. So far, all fifteen responses have been solicitations for sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38457

You deserved it

4327

Favorite

By shampoogirl - United States

Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud, I told my boyfriend. Instead of congratulating me, he got mad that my work hours include Saturday, his laundry day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31988

You deserved it

4223

Favorite

By purpleivy - United States

Today, after a conference with my teacher who had previously accused me of not doing my homework, she finally discovered she'd been losing it all this time. I've been getting straight Fs for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35586

You deserved it

2412

Favorite

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Top comments

By Joshua Daniel | 5

#7806962 - Tuesday 28 May 2019 23:48

Oh shit, that’s unfortunate and hilarious

By RichardPencil | 29

#7806968 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 1:23

Autocorrect always knows!

You cannot tell a lie.

COMMENTS

By Joshua Daniel | 5

#7806962 - Tuesday 28 May 2019 23:48

Oh shit, that’s unfortunate and hilarious

By RichardPencil | 29

#7806968 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 1:23

Autocorrect always knows!

You cannot tell a lie.

By Abbusser | 9

#7806977 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 2:12

Yeahhhhhhh... You're FU##ed...

By WeirdUS | 29

#7807007 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 5:37

Why would your phone auto corrected that generally comes up with guess is as to what it might be and what words you use frequently

By Sencilia101 | 31

#7807041 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 7:29

Send them another message apologising and tell them what you meant. I'm sure they'll understand it was an auto correct mistake.

By AstroTurfMatador | 11

#7807053 - Wednesday 29 May 2019 8:32

Oh, this is an old story. I saw this on one of those autocorrect sites at least 2 years ago.

ShortieRose | 30

#7807368 - Thursday 30 May 2019 4:16

i can assure you that this truly happened to me and i didnt "copy" it, nor have i ever submitted to another site.

By ShortieRose | 30

#7807367 - Thursday 30 May 2019 4:15

i cant believe this got posted. This happened around 3 years ago. I called my friend and explained the autocorrect moment. we laughed pretty hard. Her father ended up passing away. i still feel bad that this happened.

By Sheogorath | 4

#7809891 - Friday 7 June 2019 1:26

It's ok, I texted my boyfriend one morning "good morning love, I hope you slept well," but sent it to my manager on accident. It was really quite funny.