Miscellaneous: Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years,... - FML

By Anonymous - 16/06/2013 16:14 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years, called me and demanded to know where his Father's Day gift was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 561

You deserved it 3 374

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 09/04/2009 18:48 - United States

Today, I got a missed call from my dad, who hasn't talked to me in months and has vowed not to have anything to do with me. I called him back excitedly and apologized for missing his call, and we had a 20-second conversation about how his phone accidentally dialed my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 159

You deserved it 3 546

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 06:43 - United States

Today, I called my dad, because I haven't spoken to him in a while, and I wanted to invite him to my graduation in May. When he picked up, I said, "Hey, how have you been, dad?" He scoffed, "Wrong number" and hung up the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 847

You deserved it 3 064

By I keep failing it all - 02/06/2013 19:45 - Lithuania - Vilnius

Today, my dad found the Father's Day present that I spent at least ten hours preparing and decorating. I'd expected him to be extremely happy about this lovely gift. His only reaction was to ask if he could exchange it for something else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 922

You deserved it 3 950

Close to me

By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 742

You deserved it 1 137

By CaptainByron - 28/04/2017 00:00

Today, my father contacted me for the first time in close to 2 months. The first thing he did was ask if I wanted to buy some weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 375

You deserved it 312

Take a chance on me

By Anonymous - 02/05/2024 18:00 - United States - Harrisburg

Today, my family keeps pestering me about whether I've contacted my father yet. My father, the one who treated me and my family like crap throughout my upbringing and cheated on my mom a few years ago. I don't know why they think I'd ever want to see him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 22

By seb21 - 09/02/2009 02:32 - United States

Today, I called my dad to inform him I was coming home from college for the weekend. Expecting him to be excited, he responded with "why?" This weekend was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 513

You deserved it 2 315

By Kellye - 16/09/2009 00:24 - United States

Today, my father called me for the first time in two weeks since I moved away. Excited, I answered the phone. It was a mistake. He thought he'd called my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 332

You deserved it 2 522

Bigmouth Strikes Again

By Anonymous - 29/10/2019 04:03

Today, I was involved in an intense argument with my dad. Just as I yelled, "You haven't done one thing for me", my phone rang. The same phone that, as of today, my dad no longer pays the bill for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 5 061

Nice to know

By rejectedson - 15/10/2009 23:23 - United States

Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 656

You deserved it 2 251

Next

Top comments

omgjustno 7

Sunday 16 June 2013 23:04

Say it's in the same place as all your lost birthday and holiday presents from him

FALLENSEBZERO 16

Sunday 16 June 2013 23:03

Tell him its up his ass if he wants to be so rude.

Comments

Strrrrrange 12

Monday 17 June 2013 0:24

Wow horrible man! A fathers day present is something you earn! Everyone (unless they are sterile) can have a child, but it takes something to be a father! I hope that you have some people to talk to about this OP :) Good luck with this one.. He seem difficult

TheyCallMeDamien 17

Monday 17 June 2013 0:26

I hope you cussed him out.

jc10x 8

Monday 17 June 2013 0:27

Tell him its in your pistol, and you'll gladly show it to him

Cazz91 21

Monday 17 June 2013 1:52

Tell him you gave it to another man that is, has and always will be a real father to you. See how he likes that for an answer instead.

LissaMccracken 23

Monday 17 June 2013 1:57

You should just laugh at what a dick he is, and not worry. It is FUNNY that he thinks he deserves anything but a kick between his legs. I hate when people bail on their kids... FYL

Whatapuffchild 23

Monday 17 June 2013 2:36

what an asscrack

pwnman 33

Monday 17 June 2013 2:37

Wow, Op you should be laughing at his stupid behaviour. Buy him a book of bonding with your kids.

FrankHotpants 31

Monday 17 June 2013 2:37

Tell him you left it at all the piano recitals he missed.

mr_jack_meoff 5

Monday 17 June 2013 4:33

Just tell him he isn't your father, he was just a sperm donor.

woiz 11

Monday 17 June 2013 4:38

father with benefit ...

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The Top

Today, I was told by my sister over the dinner table that some guy is telling people I’ve had sex with him; that’s not even the worst part. He’s telling people my sister walked in. One, I haven’t talked to him in years; two, he’s really not my type, three, I’m in a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 144

You deserved it 96

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 853

You deserved it 7 893

The Top

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 443

You deserved it 6 314

Today, I had to sit for an hour listening to my girlfriend talk to her ex about his testicles. She laughed more during that conversation than she ever has with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 186

You deserved it 6 285

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 151

You deserved it 4 985

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to go crazy and get a short haircut, then dye it all pink. When we got home he wanted sex, and he'd bought me a military uniform to wear, which is when I realised he was trying to turn me into one of his anime girls FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 268

Today, after losing my job and being quarantined alone, I realized I've gained quite a bit of weight due to depression. I decided to do something about it and walk around my neighborhood. A group of teens followed me laughing and hurling insults until I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 285

You deserved it 212

Today, our 9 year-old son managed to shoot himself in the gut with my nail gun. According to my wife, this is completely my fault, because I ONLY kept it in my locked garage, ONLY secured in its box, ONLY completely disconnected from the power, ONLY on the highest shelf near the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 406

You deserved it 142