Miscellaneous: Today, my brother handed me a sandwich that I'd asked him to...

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, my brother handed me a sandwich that I'd asked him to make for me. Halfway through eating the sandwich, he started laughing hysterically. I still don't know what was in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 294

You deserved it 7 214

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Same thing different taste

Well played

By FUCK THE PIGS - 26/01/2013 20:44 - United States - Oakland

Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 548

You deserved it 4 173

By groom - 12/12/2008 02:30 - France

Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 490

You deserved it 3 148

Snack time

By oops... - 12/09/2014 05:50 - Canada - Sylvan Lake

Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 602

You deserved it 29 746

By ihatedogs - 22/06/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, my brother came down to my house, bringing his untrained puppies with him. As we were eating dinner, I dropped part of my sandwich in a liquid that was on the tablecloth. Thinking it was water, I ate it. As I chewed, I realized the liquid wasn't water. My sandwich was dipped in dog urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 887

You deserved it 19 909

By who wants spaghetti - 17/12/2015 03:42 - United States - Oconomowoc

Today, during a family dinner, I witnessed my younger brother casually slip his hand down the back of his pants, take it out, sniff each finger individually, before stirring his hand in his spaghetti and continue to eat normally. I was the only one who saw this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 876

You deserved it 1 554

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 888

You deserved it 2 328

By Anonymous - 02/11/2013 17:34 - United States - Rowland Heights

Today, my husband and I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing the matter again. Later on, he made us lasagna. The moment I swallowed the first mouthful, he smirked, then started snickering uncontrollably. What the fuck did he do to my food? FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 630

You deserved it 5 672

By Anonymous - 03/03/2012 03:05 - United States

Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 869

You deserved it 10 022

By Anonymous - 14/04/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 418

You deserved it 4 885

By DeeDee - 04/02/2014 22:08 - Austria - Vienna

Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 735

You deserved it 5 440

Freeze_fml 16

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:07

Probably some homemade mayo.

xlorawrz 9

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:07

... So did you stop eating the sandwich when he started laughing?

Comments

knockout8924 2

Monday 26 September 2011 0:12

i wud have puked!

rocketslider 0

Monday 26 September 2011 1:37

He was laughing cause you obviously don't know the kitchen and sandwich woman jokes.

Zeusthegoose 0

Monday 26 September 2011 1:56

semen, spit or some other bodly fluid

FlyingLazerWALRU 0

Monday 26 September 2011 3:13

It probably had the "special sauce" on it.

MrLoux 6

Monday 26 September 2011 3:28

Guy1 -"Its chicken surprize" Guy2 -"Hey, this isnt chicken!" Guy1 -"Yea I know, surprize!!"

suicidalgeishas 0

Monday 26 September 2011 3:57

Maybe he added a bit of his special sauce....

stoneywoney 3

Monday 26 September 2011 3:59

Maybe open it up and look?? wow this world is filled with blondes. And I happen to be one of them.

linnie_wesker 20

Monday 26 September 2011 4:17

There probably wasn't anything gross in it and he was just laughing to mess with you.

FlonkertonChamp 6

Monday 26 September 2011 5:36

THIS!!!! ahhh psychology...

Broc831 6

Monday 26 September 2011 4:50

o dear lord you didn't eat it did you?... aww....nasty

brando_jones96 0

Monday 26 September 2011 5:37

ive done that to my little sis, but i really didnt put anything in it. i was just making her paranoid!

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Same thing different taste

Well played

Snack time

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