Today, my boyfriend wrote me a long poem that ended with, "Please don't get another mister / I regret I screwed your sister". FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend was reading me a poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well… until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said, "Shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a really sweet poem that he wrote for me. I think it was secondhand - the first letter of each verse spelled his ex girlfriend's name. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to write him a poem, as I am an avid writer. Happily, I agreed. After hours of working, I proudly presented it to him. He read it, laughed, and said, "No babe, I meant a real poem." Maybe I should rethink my career choice. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML
Today, my boyfriend left me for his sister. No, not my sister. His sister. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML
Today, I wrote my boyfriend a poem, and left it on the bed with a rose for him to see after work. When I came home later, I noticed the flower in the trash, and the poem had been used as gum wrapper. FML
Today, my boyfriend wrote me a love letter saying about how much he cares for me, how he'd die for me and how he wants to spend his life with me. What really took my breath away was the confession at the end about how he "accidentally" cheated on me with my best friend. FML
Today, I wrote a text to the guy I've had a crush on for two years. I typed "hey" and put my phone down, not ready to send it. A little while later, I heard it buzz. The reply said "Um... what?" Apparently my sister had added "I'm a shitty prostitute" to my text and sent it. FML
Today, I realized that when my boyfriend said, "I'll love you forever" what he really meant was, "I'll love you until I meet your significantly more attractive sister." FML
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Top comments
Cusefan5 6
Dump his sorry ass
fakan 4
get a new mister that won't screw your sister.
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Comments (117)
Dave_Davington 35
You might want to disregard the second last line.
DanielleinDC 34
He's got to be kidding. It's up to you whether or not to forgive him and not kick him to the curb, but would he be as forgiving if you screwed his brother or best friend?
xThatOneWeirdGuy 18
What a stud and a way to drop news like that.
graceheart 1
You should write him back saying, "Sorry Man but you've been screwed, My sister was really born a dude"
cjlerch 29
He already screwed her. He kinda knows that that's not true.
Readoll 13
33...its called "surgery"
cjlerch 29
My apologies, I read that wrong.
Ksweety_fml 27
At least he said he regret it....
Raesin 21
If you forgive him OP, I hope you're prepared for him to cheat on you again, since you'll have given him a free pass he'll think he can get away with it all the time. ''Fool me once shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me.''
_marnie_lauren 8
At least he can rhyme
zombienationxo 9
What an asshole, I'm sorry OP.
ShakeDisPlace 10
Time to find a new mister that won't screw your sister..
Dinoporeon 9
I hope you got rid of him. And one day you will meet someone that won't cheat on you! I'm not sure what to say about your sister though...