By Anonymous - 03/04/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend put chili powder on our loo roll as a "harmless" prank. He forgot women use loo roll to wipe the sensitive parts of their bodies. I have itchy weeping sores inside my vagina and am considering sticking an ice cube up there to stop the burning. FML
I agree, your life sucks 5 561
You deserved it 387

Same thing different taste

Top comments

boopingsnoot 24

1. Go to the ER / A&E and get help. 2. Plain, unsweetened yogurt can help. So can ice, and probably Vagisil. 3. No sex for dumbass boyfriend. No bj, no touchy-feely, until a heartfelt apology.

Lobby_Bee 17

Oh, he knows. Nobody can be that dumb.


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Show it anyway 6

most women wipe their vaginas after using the toilet.

Gngr_Grl 26

But not usually up in our vaginas O.o

Charity Taylor 17

as true as that is it probably definitely got inside where it shouldn't since it was after all a powder.

boopingsnoot 24

I can imagine the chili powder would "poof" up off the paper and stick to moisture on contact

I assume that by ******, she doesn't mean the vaginal canal. She means the broad sense of the word and the outside of vaginal area.

Ishvah 15

shame no one wants to learn basic anatomy.

If you smooth off the edges and corners, an ice cube might not be such a bad idea.

Have you seen what happens when you lick a frozen flagpole? Ice is probably not a good idea...

boopingsnoot 24

1. Go to the ER / A&E and get help. 2. Plain, unsweetened yogurt can help. So can ice, and probably Vagisil. 3. No sex for dumbass boyfriend. No bj, no touchy-feely, until a heartfelt apology.

Sounds like this isn't your first rodeo with chilli rubbed on sensitive areas, mate.

Maybe we ought to introduce you to Clorox Butt and we can send you to Defensive Wiping class.

bigdaddyeric 35

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onceuponatime456 16
bigdaddyeric 35

Sorry, I live in America and what we call it is TP and as our President says: America First ! So no, I will not call it a loo roll and in 58 years of living and traveling the globe, I never heard it called that.....

I too live in America, and with my 22 years was able to figure this out. Loo is common British slang for toilet. So common, that American made crosswords use it all the time.

Yeah well your America first doesn't apply to everywhere else in this world. Mind-blowing, I know.

This is an international website. In fact, I believe it originated in France and that the people who run the site are French. People from all over the world post here. Try to be respectful. And even though I've never heard it called that, I figured out pretty quickly what OP meant by "loo roll".

Lobby_Bee 17

Oh, he knows. Nobody can be that dumb.

bigdaddyeric 35

No Bobby Lee I did not know nor do most people on this side of the “Pond” as you say...

That you did not know does not meant that " most people on this side of the “Pond”" don't know. I was born and raised in America. I have in fact never been out of the country at an age in which memories could be retained and I knew what loo roll was because I've heard it called that on numerous occasions. Plus it should have been easy to figure out since basically everyone on the planet has heard someone from across the pond call a toilet the loo, and therefore logically if Toilet Paper equals product you wipe your personal areas with and dispose of in the toilet, Loo paper would equal the same thing. Your attitude about the whole thing, plus your line about how " as our President says: America First !" suggest you are either a troll, or you are in reality the worst kind of American because you make the rest of us look bad with that "My countries better than your country and it's all about Me, me, me" attitude that our President is so damn proud of. America is a great country and I personally don't want to live anywhere else, but it is not so great and amazing that we have the right to tear other countries because the reality is that there is a lot of stuff that other countries still do better than us and we should work with them to try and reach that same level.

mean* and Country is* I apparently forgot to space and it assumed I meant more than one country.

bigdaddyeric 35

Nice Speech, Zzzzzzz, Maybe I thought he meant Loofah, huh?

Listen, you're an idiot. End of story.

Well..Milk helps cut down the burn if you drink it after eating spicy since it counteracts it cause it is a base and spicy things are acidic...Maybe a milk rinse ? Or plain yogurt?

Actually, milk is slightly acidic, and capsaicin is a base, but it's not an acid-base reaction that provides relief. One of the proteins in milk, casein, binds to capsaicin to help remove it and prevent from binding to the nerve receptors that trigger the burning sensation. Other fatty foods are also good, beacause capsaicin is fat-soluble.

Mungolikecandy 19

Isn't the anus a sensitive part of the body?

not sure why this is thumbed down. If the chili powder had that reaction on the ****** you'd think it would have a similar one on the anus

Mungolikecandy 19

That was my thought. Chilli powder around any such orifice would be an FML.

julfunky 29

Exactly. He didn’t “forget” anything. He knew very well where this toilet paper goes and that any situation it is used is a sensitive and painful one. He still just thought it’d be funny.

They are totally different parts of the body with different functions and different contact surface. So no, it doesn't have the same reaction on both parts.

Donut_Wizard 23

Better idea: 1. Put tampons in freezer. 2. Wait one hour. 3. Profit.

what the hell? he forgot you actually use the toilet paper to wipe with? either he's a complete idiot or he doesn't like you