By lanikai610 - 26/10/2011 18:35 - United States

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks vapor rub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 302
You deserved it 7 587

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Easy fix: take a shower.

Puffs plus indeed.

Comments

And your grandma let you use Kleenex?

Nothing hurts more than a burning crotch.

Couldn't you smell the Vicks???

1- what a stupid question.

Humm, well OP.. You got burned.

Take a shower OP?

Corygerm- your effing hot :)

24- idk about you but I don't know anyone who smells their toilet paper before they use it..

#57: true that, lol. but whenever someone has Vicks vapor on their chest or back, I could smell it from a few feet away. the smell is really strong! :3

63- true but in the tissues you can't really smell it unless it's like 3 inches from your nose lol but I still feel bad for OP. :(

And that's how the flaming lips got their name.

Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!

At least your ass hole smells good now..

ouch that's gotta hurt! sorry OP

Brings a whole new meaning to fire crotch

At least it wasn't sandpaper

54- I don't care what you say... 80 grit gets the job done well...

Replace the vapor rub tissue with sand paper. That'll teach the bitch

FYL. Sounds super painful but that's what labels are supposed to be for.

Feel the burnnn.

Unless her grandma had one of those weird Kleenex warmer things.

at first i thought it was a guy and he was jacking off and his dick was on fire

I thought the same thing #137

Your grandmother is an evil woman.

5- I laughed so hard at your pic... its funny cause Im black but I think kfc is kind of gross

Don't those smell and feel different?

I was thinking the same thing. I had those things in my room and my whole room smelled like vicks

Puffs plus indeed.

Not quite my ass. Puffs plus lotion is the best replacement if you're talking kleenexes because they're thick and soft and have a fair amount of lotion in them. Suprised the gma didn't have Tucks or something though or like Scotty wipes for those hard times (pun not intended) which may have worked better than any Kleenex because they were meant to be used down there near that area... But even a napkin or a paper towel would have been better than a vapor rub Kleenex. I agree that OP should have felt/smelled that all too familiar smell before putting that down there but Jesus. Maybe you should do your gma a favor and just go purchase her some real TP instead of typing it all out on FML for us to read while she has the potential to suffer the same fate...? You know how gmas are sometimes with their thinking... Sometimes not always there, this doesn't really help your case, kinda just makes you look bad for not helping her get some if she was truly out!

Damn woman, writing a life story on kleenex and puff plus tissues? FYI .. too long didn't read.

Easy fix: take a shower.

That thing can be difficult to wash off.

especially if its way up there..

What? Why would it be way up there... she said she used it as toilet paper, not as a tampon... And no, actually it is not hard to wash off--unless youre unfamiliar with soap.

Or sit down in a cold bath.

Are you a guy or a girl?

Obviously a girl if they're wiping their crotch

Fucking Kleenexes, man!! How do they work?!

Captainsparklez reference? Sir were you aware it is physically possible for males to while their dick?

I immediately regret this desicion!!!!!!! - captansparkelz

"So we have, uh...Dude and Fly Like a G-6"

Captainsparklez... Fuckin hilarious

You should switch her blood pressure with sugar pills, that will teach her lol

Switch her blood pressure? For a normal pressure of 80/120, you would do 80 sugar/120 pills or the other way around?

I believe he meant to say switch her blood pressure pills with sugar pills, for those of u who didnt get it... And i also feel like that was an answer to one of the GOAT questions in Fallout 3... Just saying...

We all know what he wanted to say....but didn't. Just some friendly stirring of the pot.

She would die before she learned the lesson.

36- generalized occupation aptitude test... I cheated :D