Today, my boyfriend opened the car door in a very kind and loving way. What wasn't so kind and loving was that my hand was still half-way when he closed it. FML
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Today, as I was getting out of the car, my 7-year-old son opened the door for me. I thought it was very gentlemanly of him to do that, until he smashed my thumb with the car door. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
Today, I leaned in to kiss my boyfriend goodnight at the door. He smiled sweetly, cupped my cheek… and then used his other hand to pull the last slice of pizza out of my hand and slam the door shut. FML
Today, I thought I'd be a suave gentleman by opening the car door for my date. The handle came off in my hand, and I had to spend the next 15 minutes pretending I was doing an impromptu repair on my piece of shit car, when I had no idea what I was doing. FML
Today, after a large, dramatic fight with my girlfriend in a parking lot, we stopped arguing altogether and hugged, dropping the issue. Twenty seconds later, I accidentally slammed her hand in the car door, breaking two of her fingers. FML
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML
Today, while arguing with my boyfriend about how I wasn't a bad driver and could parallel park, I thought it would be easier to just let him do it. Unfortunately, while getting out of the car to switch seats, I forgot to take the car out of drive and it ran into the car in front of us. He was right. FML
Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML
Today, I was on a subway with my boyfriend and it was stopping so I grabbed the pole for support. I felt another hand grabbing onto the pole knowing it was my boyfriend's. Without looking I carressed and tickled his hand. I turned around to smile at my boyfriend. The hand wasn't his. FML
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Top comments
NitroTonicsFML 4
Gotta hand it to you, that hurts.
fashionistaGirll 0
It was just an accident no need to do a crazy disgusting revenge...
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Comments (134)
lovelife9 12
did he mean to do it?
seeunexttuesdays 6
Pretty sure a boyfriend won't wanna crush his girlfriends hand in a car door.
stayawakee 0
It's the thought that counts. Some guys don't ever open the door for their girl. Quit complaining and just be happy.
hillary6 15
Well at least he opened the door
tj4234 36
He obviously wanted to remind you that your place is the kitchen, not the car.
lazywitekid 0
It's the thought that counts right?
GamerMatt97 0
Ouch but hey accidents happen.
IndyJustin 4
so I guess he can't have his hand job later?
divadro102 16
I read this and pictured it in slow motion. Odd moments in life when suddenly it all turns slowwww.
indigo1 0
eishhhhh....seriuuuuus! jammer!
Legendslayer222 26
Only one possible answer... The car is alive.