Today, my best friend slapped me and called me a some colorful words before telling me that she never wanted to talk to me again because I supposedly slept with her boyfriend. Not only am I a virgin, but I'm a lesbian. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was approached by a girl who called me a slut for sleeping with her boyfriend, then punched me in the face. I'm a virgin. FML
Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML
Today, my best friend of 10 years told me she had slept with a man who had a girlfriend. I told her that it wasn't that bad. She then informed me that it was my boyfriend. FML
Today, my best friend called me a slut during an argument, and I couldn't stop myself from laughing. She lost her virginity at 13 years-old, and all four of her kids have a different dad. When I mentioned it, she gave me a black eye. FML
Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, as things were getting hot with my girlfriend, it came up that I'm a virgin. She broke up with me. FML
Today, my lesbian best friend told me she might be bi and wanted to try sex with a guy she trusts, AKA me. She eventually convinced me, but after we'd had 'weird best friend sex' she decided she’s a lesbian after all, and I “took advantage of her temporary confusion,” so we’re not friends anymore. WTF? FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my female best friend. When I pointed out that my friend's a lesbian, she said, "How the hell does that change anything?" I have no idea why I'm not happy to be rid of that paranoid imbecile. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams, unfortunately she called me by my ex-bestfriend's name. FML
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Top comments
lollipop217 0
obviously she's not really your best friend if she doesn't know you're a virgin or a lesbian
Lou_Briccant 0
How colourful were the words? Were they just shades of gray, or did she get real creative and start throwing in such colours as "magenta", or "sky blue"?
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Comments (143)
happyfingers 15
Why exactly does she think you slept with her boyfriend?? Who told her that? And does she not know that you're a lesbian? o.O
cupcakeb15 9
Awwww! i understand what its like. Before i met my current gf, everyone would say those exact kind of words. Inbox me anytime! :)
photogfrog 13
Gold star!!!!
deerizz3413 5
Bitch
akpeterson7765 6
That would seriously suck
echosong 16
But she doesn't!
skittyskatbrat 19
You know... if she's such a neurotic bitch...call her crying and tell her that you are pregnant now, then hang up. She wants to believe a rumor, give her one to really freak out about!
fantasyworld 39
She doesn't sound like a great friend if she believes that stuff.
crowley666 10
Ida smacked some sense into her back shoot
reqret17 13
this is y i hang with my guy friends