Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
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Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Today, I was picking up my 10 year-old step-son from the airport. He began screaming and crying saying that I wasn't his father. I ended up sitting in a holding room because the security guards thought I was kidnapping him. My wife thought it was hilarious. FML
Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy a phone I saw last week. I looked around a little first, then continued to the electronics section. I couldn't find the phone I saw, so I went to leave. Halfway to the exit, I was detained by security and grilled for ages over my "suspicious behaviour". FML
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
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Top comments
EdwardC777 9
That beyond blows. Airport security isn't fun when you're NOT being accused of smuggling firearms
jessejamesc 8
when he goes into the next grade, tell the teacher he lies about everything he says and to never ever trust him, *wink*
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Comments (102)
davincidasecond 24
I would embarrass the hell out of that kid if he did that to me. A spanking would definitely be in order.
kbummm 8
What a brat. -.-'
chosha_fml 26
If he gets candy anytime again this year, YDI. That bullshit is far too serious to let him off lightly - not just the security aspect, but a huge lie AND the fact that it was a nasty act of revenge for nothing more than not getting his way in something so petty.
DDCA 24
Make him kneel on uncooked rice. No bruises or CPS needed. I guarantee you he will mind what you say more often.
silvanawernli 5
he is a spoiled son.
still_guns 16
Why the heck was an interrogation needed? A simple x-ray would've sufficed.
lambda_fml 40
Perhaps he meant the "other" machine gun in your "suitcase" ;-)
oskarwal90 4
Parents who says spanking is the way to go, has big problems. Learn how to raise your kids right and you never have to give them a spanking. Just makes me mad that people even consider spanking their kid due to that they suck at parenting.
Savner 16
I got spanked as a kid and I turned out just fine. There's nothing wrong with it and people who think it's bad to punish children this way are the reason there are so many delinquents.
xkncas 8
If you were my kid, I would be spanking you for this reply.
ileenefudge 29
I'm assuming 96 doesn't have kids. You NEED to discipline your kids to make sure they grow up and respect you sometimes. Talking DOES NOT always work, because every child is different. Some respond to light threats such as "your gonna get in trouble" but most don't. Ever try to reason with a 3 year old that is so use to you "threatening" him with that phrase? After a while it doesn't work. They get use to your little talks because they know its all just talk and nothing more. I know a 4 year old who gets away with being rude and all her mom does is say she's gonna get in trouble but never actually does anything and she knows her mom won't do anything about her bad behavior so she does it anyways even out in public. You need to teach your child that they can't get away with this crap and if you think butt swatting is too much, then you probably won't be a great parent because your child will take advantage of you. When your child comes home at 15 and pregnant or your little boy is in Juvenile hall for stealing, your probably also going to be one of those parents asking themselves where you went wrong, and the answer will be that you either were not there for your child or you didn't discipline them because you were scared to hurt their feelings or scared of what others think of your parenting skills or lack thereof. Ok end rant.
Brilliant66star 17
His type of 'clever' needs to be left stranded at the airport to figure the way onward alone. Your kid's brain needs something to do. On the bright side, at least he picked a gun and not drugs. Your future life together looks like one thrill after another. FYL.
Zomg_Okay 26
98 - Not really a bright side. I'd assume airport security would view a potential terrorist as a bigger deal than a potential smuggler.
LilMsSunshine68 6
OP, you're in big trouble if your child is doing this at this young age. Perhaps he needs therapy or to be evaluated for an anger issue or mental health issue. Or perhaps he just needs a good old fashioned ass whoopin'!