Today, my 2-year-old daughter and my 27-year-old husband both woke me up in the early hours of the morning. Their complaints were the same: they'd both wet the bed. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Rising Damp
Today, while I was asleep, my three-year-old cousin wet the bed again. MY bed. FML
Well rested
Today, after a long airplane trip, I arrived at a hotel hoping to get some rest at last. At around 2 AM, my older daughter (13) suddenly got up to start yelling things while sleepwalking. My younger daughter (4) slept all night peacefully, but I realized she had forgotten to put on her nighttime diaper. FML
How sweet
Today, my 3-year-old fell asleep in our bed while cuddling me, and I let him stay since he was being so sweet. In the middle of the night, he took off his pants and pissed all over my head and back. FML
That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!
Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML
Today, I woke up to my two year old crawling in bed with me and saying, "I poop". Normally this would be ok, but this morning she decided she didn't need a diaper. FML
Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML
Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Blackmail material
Today, I was staying at a hotel and had a night terror. I woke up, yelled, "Fuck!" and realized I had shit the bed. I'd woken up my teenage daughter, who now knows I shit the bed in the middle night. FML
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
Top comments
Steve95401 49
Did you tie him to the bed the night before?
suicidehacker21 8
Like father like daughter D'aww.
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Comments (46)
WholeWheatBread 9
Is it to late to say "Wet Dream?"