Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came on; the DJ came on the mic and said "Single ladies raise your hands!" My girlfriend raised her hand. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while at the club, I started dancing with a girl who I had noticed throughout the night. When she turned around she firmly stated, "I'd much rather dance by myself". FML
Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML
Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML
Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML
Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML
Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
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Top comments
darkfaery 0
If you two are not married, then technically, she IS single. And if you don't want her to be single, then you ought to put a ring on it!
Carolaaine 0
As long as she doesn't try to kiss another boy (or boyS) you're quite safe.. It's just a song
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Comments (155)
rosethename 0
not a fml grow some balls and show her she got you
gambit50 0
dude alk girl raise there hands retart
sykokitti 15
wow you need help... lighten up its just a song, you went to the club to have fun...
ArielTheMermaid 17
single or not I always put my hands up to this song
ally8162002 4
technically you are single until your married.. on tax forms you fill out it doesn't say do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend just single married or widowed .
gymnstemily92 0
U just got dumped ;-)
youtubetre_fml 14
I hope for you she just didn't understand... Or maybe that was an hidden message ...
epicfailwin97 0
If u like it u should put a ring on it BITCH!!
wrwrestler8 4
This is why as a man, you gotta work out every single day! I know that being with a girlfriend makes us men weak and we dont feel like working out and being buff anymore, we just wanna have sex and chill and cuddle and all that shit... but honestly we gotta PUT IN THEM REPS ANYWAY! Cuz when it comes down to a situation like this? We gotta be BUFF and be the alpha male and be like "look babe, you can BE single all you want, but if any guy tries to dance with you im gonna knock him out" and have that be that. and if your not buff then shes just gonna L-O-L
Gabby15410 0
I woulda taken the keys and left her at the club