Today, it's Saint Patrick's Day and the nicest day of the year so far. I'm spending it in the bathroom, puking up the sushi I'd eaten last night. The luck of the Irish can't help me on this one. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm on spring break on a tropical island, visiting family I hadn't seen in years. They invited me out to eat, and won't take no for an answer. All of this would be wonderful, if it weren't for the fact that I've been vomiting to the point of expelling bile and dry heaving for the last two days. FML
Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off, feeling incredibly sick. I then ran downstairs and had diarrhea while I threw up. I spent Valentine's Day having diarrhea every time I coughed or sneezed. FML
Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML
Today, I started 2018 with a bad case of food poisoning. Not exactly the New Year's cleanse I was hoping for. FML
Today, I started my first 3-day weekend in over a month after asking for one. I also start the neverending diarrhea and vomit spiral because my stomach can’t handle a little spice. So much for a relaxing 3-day weekend. FML
Today, after a week of staying in at night and fighting off a persistent cold, I was finally feeling well again, so I decided to go to my boyfriend's work BBQ. I got food poisoning. FML
Today, it's my wedding day, and I have uncontrollable diarrhea. FML
Today, I went out to eat to celebrate getting over the stomach flu. I hadn't eaten solid food in over a week, so I was really excited and ordered my favorite dish. It gave me food poisoning. FML
Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
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Top comments
The_Toxic_Mite 0
Ooh, the sad, sad irony. FYL.
Monikabug 9
Ahhh, been there! That sucks OP. Next time try to be more careful about what kind of sushi you are eating, and don't be afraid to ask how fresh their catches are. FYL!
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Comments (152)
Monikabug 9
Ahhh, been there! That sucks OP. Next time try to be more careful about what kind of sushi you are eating, and don't be afraid to ask how fresh their catches are. FYL!
thor89 0
arrogato Mr.Robato
johnw11 0
ydi for eating that asian shit
VanessaVander 2
that's why I don't eat sushi often
vball_luvah 2
yes #1. being cheap doesn't do you any good when it comes to sushi. because you pay dearly afterwards. as you know know, OP. and it suckss that that happened. because you won't wanna eat sushi anymore and then you would be missing out :) that stuff is pretty awesomee.
schnitzel5 0
shushi is awsome but u can't eat too much of it or else you'll probly get sick
cheap123 0
Who says that? Anyway, you've got no reason to have a low self-esteem. Unless that's someone else in that picture... if it is, you're weird. If it's you, you're cute.
Straka 0
yea well I've been sick for 6 days w the stomach flu
Darraghscoot 0
paddys day best day ever im 15 and i smoked and drank all day!! coz im irish;) .FYL
jasonsaied 1
um what the **** are you talking about 27?
relyo 0
Have some Guinness. It'll kill the germs and you'll feel right as rain.
katmandont 0
My wife had that happen to her during a 17hr plane ride to Korea. Luckily, I wasn't sitting in the seat next to her to deal with her ruping through the rest of the plane ride.
icall_BS 0
MOM, I'm puking my guts out. Hand me my computer so I can post this on FML.
AndreaHaha 0
Haha that sucks
ydiftw 0
The puke better be green or i'm gonna pinch you.
Felendris 0
um. to he honest. YDI for nor being Irish and celebrating St Patricks Day. I hate it when non Irish people celebrate it. I mean, people ******* PUNCHED me in the face today for not wearing green. I wore my only green shirt yesterday >_>
betty66 3
shut up, everyone likes a good beer
Monikabug 9
@84 You should have punched them back and told them that you do not care ifthe Leprechauns pinch you, therefore you will not wear green. Plus, who punches people on St. Patrick's day? It is supposed to be a pinch. ._.
disgruntledyouth 0
who cares if your irish
Guuurlplease 0
People are in haiti starving so maybe over eating isn't something you should complain about!
twist_of_fame93 0
if it makes you feel any better. once I had to get up at 2 am so I could puke out my entire digestive system. it hurt like hell
abcnonamecba 0
paddys day was awsome :) and I would hate to have missed it XD
kally2010 0
the Irish care !! don't pretend to be Irish !
Felendris 0
sorry, I never look at OP's name :P oh, today apparently someone recognized me on FML somehow and kicked me in the balls for telling FML -_- I'm being abused HALP xD (oh Jesus can't wait til their bday...)
CaroAurelia 12
#84, How the **** do you know OP's not of Irish descent? I know it says he's from America, but he could be Irish-American (like yours truly).
ashlynn610 12
I'm sorry.. FYL
sethrazdizzle 0
Dude you musta had a frap year
Dathomir2 0
isn't the object of saint patricks day to vomit anyway haha
averageirishman 0
WTF @ 82
hockey_kid_29 0
YES thats wat happened to me after partyin all day
seeimdee 0
83; your ******' Irish and you don't know what st.patricks day is for? 1)you drink. 2)you puke. dumbass...haha
ElMetalero 0
actually the only luck the irish had was bad luck, so u have the luck of the irish alright.
protwtf 0
Be quiet Mexican, go eat a burrito or something. And to the idiots above stating that if you eat sushi too much you'll get sick, that's a load of ******* crap.
quikwit1212 0
76: You're racist and quite obviously have anger issues.
protwtf 0
The person to whom I replied either removed their comment or it was somehow deleted, because that's not who I replied to. It just so happens to be that my comment is now posted under someone of Mexican heritage, thus making me look far more racist than I actually am...
protwtf 0
Actually, disregard my previous comment. Due to the error of my iPhone what appeared false was actually correct. I now stand by my original statement.
VeryNice329 0
you eat anything in excess, you most likely will get sick. sushi, pasta, cereal...it doesn't matter! and who gives a hoot that it's st. pattys day? I got shitfaced this past weekend because it was Saturday.
johnw11 0
ydi for eating that Asian shit
Lov3r 0
:( bad fish. bad sushi :( that sucks. are you Irish?
StoryOfTheYear 15
can't be Irish, maybe bulemic? ^ however it's spelt
kally2010 0
luck of the Irish only applies if your Irish ! I'm Irish and I hate when people say that they are irish wen there not ! if ur lik 1 8th Irish your nt reli Irish ! also people who say " my cousins great uncles ex-wifes best friend is Irish so happy st patricks day " no 1 gives a shit so don't say it unless you won't some pissed off Irish people ! simple as !!!
Blue_Coconuts 7
You can be part Irish, and claim that you're part Irish.... Technically if you're not an Irish American, you can't "claim" to be Irish either by your logic. You're either not at all Irish, part Irish, full Irish, or Irish American... For example, I'm Irish American because I was born in Dublin and immigrated to the United States when I was 13. :D
StoryOfTheYear 15
blue- haha, Irish ppl ftw, I'm not Irish, but most Irish ppl I know are pretty cool
kally2010 0
yeah that counts but people who are part Irish and call themselves Irish to look cool just piss some Irish people off ! really you could say you were Irish !
kally2010 0
yes we are ! that's why people pretend to be or say that they're Irish !
yourlifesfucked 0
blue i r jealous =( im only a quarter, and thats bastardized from my dads english blood =
hannahpie45 0
someones a little snippy now aren't we? he has the right to say it too. no need to get angry
ImaginaryFoe 1
Wow you are really upset about this, Kally. Who cares what people say? It doesn't make you less Irish; it just makes them pathetic. I am 1/16 Irish and that's where I got my surname. I never tell people I'm Irish though. When they inevitably ask, I give them the breakdown.
Blue_Coconuts 7
Yeah Ireland is pretty much awesome. I loved it there... Now if you excuse me, I have a bar to get to...
seeimdee 0
I met a Irish man on a app on my iPod. he was 28. lost his vCard to a 8 year old when he was 17, and has gone for the younger since then. he sent me pictures of a 12 year old sucking his dick. he begged me for nude pictures. yeah...that's the opposite of the irish people y'all are talking about. other then that... irish=win(: lol
kally2010 0
101... he sounds like a pedophile !!!!!!!
kally2010 0
don't say that n e tin even slightly English relates to Ireland to an Irish person ... you may end up punched in the face ! iriish really hate the English
CaroAurelia 12
I'm a quarter Irish American. Does that count? If not, I make up for my lack of Irish blood with admiration of Irish culture, so **** off.
fat_spaz 0
fyl that sucks
kingleonitaz 0
I'm irish
ashlynn610 12
grrrr monikabug grrrr lol I was supposed to be first lmao... idc... you're really pretty (:
Monikabug 9
Sorry Ashlynn! :) Lol But you're really pretty too!
ashlynn610 12
awh thanks (: I actually have a really low self-esteem so that made me happy (:
alexandraa_fml 0
There's no reason a pretty girl like yourself should have self esteem issues ashlynn! :)
perdix 31
All three of you are beautiful! I'm gonna need some ice over here!
ashlynn610 12
lol oh lord
Olympian94 0
It's wierd how guys don't compliment each other on looks lmao. Then again, why would we? Lmfao
Gaz717 0
Perdix FTW!
ScaryyMary 14
Damn you people and your gorgeous pictures! Why do you think I'm covering my face in mine? D:
seeimdee 0
scarymaryy; you look adorable!(: lol. I'm so jelous of you girls, why do you think I deleted my picture?
paigeatsflesh 11
aww you guys are cute commenting on how pretty eachother are. you all are beautiful!:D
Monikabug 9
Pfft we are ALL beautiful, including you Paige. :) Mary, you can uncover your face. Lol You shouldn't have deleted your picture, Dee. You should put it back up.
ashlynn610 12
Dee, if I remember correctly, you are really pretty. (:
Person1233 13
It's so damn nice out, and I'm stuck on Facebook and FML, because of a leg injury, FML. I feel for you OP.
PsychoMerk 0
beer wouldve totally been worth it >_> I love sushi! :D ur prolly allergic though 0_o
peacelove1297 0
omg that's so weird I was throwing up 2 days ago!!!!!
kally2010 0
omg ! **** off there's always some1 doing the same shit as you somewhere in the world ! build a bridge and get over it !