By ironik970 - 17/09/2011 06:56 - United States

Spicy
Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 510
You deserved it 2 788

ironik970 tells us more.

OP here, I can kill a raccoon if it "comes after me" but all of the animal grunting and weird sounds emitting from the walls just paint an image of frightening animal sex in my mind. By the way its the only room on the floor so it's not coming from the room next door.

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Top comments

.. You know you like it. You and your beastiality.

Some guy died because he tried to have sex with raccoons on 1000 Ways to Die

Comments

Wow sounds like and blast. And FIRST!

Way to go. You win a prize. Nothing.

1 finally decided he's not gonna hide the fact he's twelve years old on FML.

Wow sounds like a TROLL. And FUCK U!

I hate racoons! lol have fun!

^^^ and you like sweaty balls?

ha who doesn't?;) lol jk

Haha rofl

i hope you and your pets got your rabies shot xD

Find a way to kill them raccoons

Angry sex is the best.

I'm from AZ where it gets to 120, 90 seems nice haha

What a wimp. Over the summer, my room was (on average) 95 degrees. Even now, it's 88 degrees and I'm like "huh... great weather at last!" Then again, I lived in New York and now live in Texas, so maybe that's why I'm not spoiled? ;)

.. You know you like it. You and your beastiality.

"hey son, do you want to visit your aunt and uncle?" "no." Problem solved.

Angry HOT sex :)

I believe you've misspelled "bestiality". Sorry, had to.

bestiality is when a HUMAN has sex with an animal. that's not bestiality.

Time to go coon huntin boy!

lol laughed out loud when I saw this comment:P

I laughed twice as hard just because of the relevance of your picture.

I didn't laugh at all because I didn't get the reference :(

Angry sex is the best kind!

Depending on ur profile picture, you look about 7 years old, like wtf?

yes because all 7 year old have muscles that big... like wtf?

With cats? CILF?

25.... what of it?

#15 You sound like a 7 year old yourself. Judging by what you wrote on your profile.

This is what happens when these kids don't water down there red cordial enough get on a sugar rush and wanna argue...

..what? ^

Omfg who the cares

You leave my sexy orange pussy alone...

Trap the raccoons and make them your friends. Then use the air conditioner so you both will be cold!

And you believe them?? LOL They just don't want to spend the money!! BTW, Santa and the Tooth Fairy don't exist.

Who the fucks lap was I sitting on????!

And what psycho stole the teeth from under my pillow?!?!?!

LIES!!! Then who was it that offered me free candy and a dollar in exchange for my tooth and panties while I was walking down the street when I was 7? Hmmm... Now that I think about it, she looked more like Brad Garrett from Everybody Loves Raymond dressed in a fairy dress driving a white van...

It's was blue, not white . . .

37- How the hell would you know the color of the van? You weren't th..... Wait a minute... Son of a bitch! What the fuck did you do with my panties?

Or maybe he turned it on and heard it for himself?

Well! At least you didn't say that the eater bunny isn't real! Had me worried for a minute there!

Shotgun time!!!!

Some guy died because he tried to have sex with raccoons on 1000 Ways to Die

wasn't he camping with his guy friend and girl friend and they started having sex, so he got sexually aroused & tried masturbating with a raccoon?

They were drunk russians in chernobyl, what do you expect.

Heh. I seen that episode. he went with his guy friend and I'm pretty sure his own girlfriend and his friend and girlfriend got it going and he was jealous so he tried to get it with the raccoon. He was also an idiot...

Lol yeah that's a weird show, but I always watch it

I saw this one episode where this chick choked to death because she was practicing with a huge cucumber!

yea I saw both of those . LOL .

Its just the guy from the Allstate Insurance commercial.