Today, I went to visit my mother after many years. Her hoarding has gotten so bad that now the house is entirely filled with junk and garbage, and she is camping out in the jungle of a backyard, cooking on a cauldron over a fire and shitting in the compost pile, with no working heat or water. FML
childofcrazy tells us more.
Many thanks to those who understand hoarding behavior and who defended me. In case you were wondering: 1. I have tried to help my mother for over 20 years and she refuses help, professional or otherwise. 2. I exaggerated how long it has been. I have seen my mother many times, usually she visits me. She has not allowed into my childhood home since I left for college 12 years ago. It has just gotten worse now. She really is living in the backyard, this is not an exaggeration. 3. I am currently working on what to do for her; I am trying to get her some help in this crisis, even if that includes forceful removal. 4. Humor helps me deal with tragic circumstances. This is why I chose to share this ridiculously sad story. 5. Hoarding is never the child's fault. I have been living this down and getting over guilt my whole life. 6. I can only imagine being on TV would be akin to suicide for her, as hoarding is a secretive problem. 6. Kids, if you live in a cluttered landfill of a house, your parents' hoarding is its own mental disorder. It is an addiction. Childrenofhoarders.com is a great first resource. There is help. 7. Yes, I think my mom is probably doing spells in the backyard. I gotta get this shit figured out before winter. She is in Iowa.
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Top comments
MyNameIsLaughter 18
Get her some help maybe?
IcemistDragon 20
You really should get her some help,she can't keep living like that even if she thinks it's acceptable.
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Comments (108)
suckceed 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You do realize that visiting her after many years, is the kind of thing that makes the inner turmoil of a hoarder even worse. So you in fact are part of the reason why things have gotten so bad for her. Unless she was an abusive mother, I don't think it's right for you to have been neglecting her for so many years.
GaryWilson 2
She is a hoarder, Vikky. She's severely mentally ill. It's entirely likely she wasn't able to care for OP as a child, or that she wasn't able to have a healthy relationship with her as an adult. OP probably broke contact to protect herself.
middlenamefrank 8
Amen. If you've ever had a hoarder in your life, you'll understand just how insidious of a disease it is. It destroys people from the inside out, and for the people around them, often the only alternative is to separate themselves from the chaos.
tweetbaby14 18
Why is this your fml? You're only there to say hi. You get to leave she however has to stay in it. Don't make this about you, dude.
ally8 21
Sounds like an intervention and a professional cleanup/ counselling is in order. You could call Hoarders at A&E and have it televised :)
vikky538 29
Its time you take care of your mother!!!
middlenamefrank 8
I'm so sorry, OP. Hopefully you'll be able to find her some help that will finally convince her she needs to accept some changes into her life. Hoarding is a very, very serious disease.
oliviaaclairee 13
I guess "my mom's a witch" takes a whole new meaning... The literal one.
Angelrose2004 17
My husband is a hoarder. Every time I get rid of crap, he brings more in. It is quite irritating! I put some of the stuff on the front porch and told him that he didn't have to get rid of it. But he needed to find a place to store it... preferrably a storage shed. He called his friend and told him I was kicking him out. He refuses to get help, cuz he doesn't think he has a problem and needs everything. I've finally started throwing things away that I know he won't miss while he's gone. I threw away an old coffee pot the other day (never once have I seen him drink coffee). He noticed. Oops.
hayleybee44 12
Next on Hoarders...
roxar_fml 16
She should be on Hoarders
Dontmindmehere 4
Ya'll should get hoarders: buried alive to go to your/the hoarder's house. Or at least see a professional. It's a real part of having OCD but it's really hard to understand why people do the things they do.