Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to play Twister. Her parents watched us the whole time, making sure we didn't touch. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I hosted a family game night with her grandparents and her father, who was bringing his "friend" who he'd been dating for a couple of weeks. It was my mom. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that her mom doesn't give us any privacy when we're at their place. I suggested that we go to my place for a change, and she agreed. Her mom called my house three times to see what we were doing. We're well beyond teenagers. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house, and her dad saw us. She decided that she didn't feel like riding along when it was time for her dad to drive me home, and went to bed. I, on the other hand, got to have a 15-minute conversation about the merits of "physical boundaries." FML
Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I babysat our neighbors' 10 year-old. After a while, he challenged us to a pillow fight. I opted out, but she accepted. I went to use the bathroom and I came back to find her face down on the floor, as he sat on her back bashing a pillow against her head. What the hell did I miss? FML
Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
HelplessSerenade 5
Twister requires you to get tangled up together...whether they like it or not you're gonna end up touching each other.
PrincessPesa 20
It's not just twister, mister. Don't you know? Twister is the gateway drug to a lifetime of reckless sexual abandon. You may even be be the product of a game of sexy twister! Evil board games, corrupting our youths. What is the world coming to?!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
Lyvania 1
Huh. I used to play twister and it never got sexual. I mean sure, it was awkward in some of the ways we ended up touching, but it's twister, the game of awkwardness.
MRVOlivia 22
That is something my parents would do. They wouldn't leave us alone in the same room.
how_to_implode 17
Expert level Twister. Nice.
ermahgerd1236 6
Freaks, ******* retards just gotta go away
tehaustiebear 34
I apologize for having taken so long, I never even knew my FML from years ago got published. To clear things up, I was 16 or 17 at the time, so I suppose every parent would be suspicious. I fed off it a bit, as embarrassing my girlfriend was far more enjoyable than the game would've been alone.
morganshea 16
It's funny because we fell for each other. XD Haha we can play Twister when I come see you; add to your list of things to do with me. :)
iraisadumbass 14
Most 16 year olds live at home, and that is too old for parents to be supervising a date.