Today, I was walking down the street when I had a coughing fit. The next thing I know I'm being pushed about by a group of guys who were smoking, because they thought I was coughing deliberately to send them a message about smoking being bad. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while walking home with my friends. As I was struggling to breathe, they thought I was attention-seeking and left me on the floor. FML
Today, I had a violent coughing fit while at the store, which caused a lady to think I was choking, grab me from behind and start doing the Heimlich maneuver incorrectly. She broke two of my ribs. FML
Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML
Today, I was walking through town when a rough looking woman asked me for a cigarette. I don't smoke but I offered her some apples, and she took two. As I continued on past her, she pegged both of them at me, hitting the back of my head. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML
Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML
Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. I had my headphones in and was blasting my music. It was also cold so I had my hood up. I had my back turned to the house and wasn't paying attention. My brother thought I was a burglar and tackled me to the concrete. FML
Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML
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Top comments
LiterOfCola 16
Run away! You shouldn't have that much trouble out running them after all
Airman1988 9
Smoking is bad kids m'kay
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Comments (96)
theslimshadylp 6
You're such a badass.
fatalwish 6
sucks man people get way to defensive.
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
You tell him, slim shady.
MermaidSongXOXO 6
You'd think that in the middle of kicking your ass they'd stop for a smoke.
delicious69 5
Should have punched the closes one in the lip then ran like forest...
outoftown 27
Sorry that happened, OP. What a bunch of drama queens. Every cough has to be about them.
lukemack 4
Wasn't Knox city was it lol? so many d*ck Heads in Victoria like that
SenselessPattern 12
Believe it or not, there was an FML about somebody coughing near smokers on purpose and then getting beat up, so maybe these guys read that FML and became distrustful of coughing.
Bpwoods 6
Let me guess, after that, out of the corner of your eye, you saw a pretty little thing approaching you? Then not even 15 minutes later you saw the shadow of a man creep out sight?
Megies89 0
Yes! Just yes.
JoshB_24 10
Push back!