Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML
Today, all I wanted was to spend some time with my husband, since we're always very busy. He couldn't be bothered to put down his video game. Guess I'm forever alone, even in a relationship. FML
Today, I was playing solitaire when an achievement popped up on my phone. "You have just completed your 1000th game of solitaire!" Never felt so alone in my life. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who kept checking his phone every five minutes. When I asked him if everything was okay, he told me he was just playing Candy Crush. FML
Today, after weeks of being hounded to go out on a date with this guy, I finally found the time and invited him over, fully intending to hook up. He stood me up. FML
Today, I decided to clean my room, find a job, and ask a girl on a date. I ended up playing video games online instead. FML
Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML
Today, I had a date with someone I met online. We agreed to meet at a nice restaurant. I got there early, ordered a drink, and waited. And waited. An hour later, I texted to ask where he was. His response? "I’ve been watching you from my car for the last hour. Decided you’re not my type." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML
Today, after not dating for 2 years, I went out on 2 dates. I got stood up both times. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DoubleRainbows 1
16. you forgot the dating game.
OneLittleAdditio 9
why the whole night? you should've given up after half an hour if he didn't call. Go out and have fun with your friends!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (83)
Legendslayer222 26
I'm more Spider Solitare personally. At least this has given you a chance to practice your card game skills so you can dazzle him when he arrives (if he does).
iEatGuppies 0
i love spider solitaire! it's impossible to lose and it makes me feel better when I win(:
Legendslayer222 26
Wait, it's impossible to lose?! How did I manage it??
Sunny_Eclipse 6
Awww, I know the feeling.
ImInABox 6
My mom steals my iPod Touch just so she can play solitaire til it's dead.. Then she charges it back up and then it's the same routine.
chlorinegreen 27
idk why so many thumbs down. but I think it kinda sucks your mom does that. tell her to get her iPod.
yajamannin 0
yea tell her 2 get an iPhone or iPad
whoa_is_failz 6
so the FML here is that you won 1 out of 15 games and not the fact that you got stood up?
zenti 2
I think it's more of an added insult to injury kind of thing. She's already having a bad night because her date didn't show up, and now she's having a crappy time playing a card game.
aogpi 7
draw three or draw one?
perdix 31
"Playing solitaire" is a euphemism for masturbation, so winning is almost a sure thing. Even if you don't actually win, you can always fake it -- there's a skill that can always be polished.
Flapjakels 0
RoFl that's pretty funny shit there XD
Phil135 4
Oh my god, Perdix. You're still alive. I am almost crying. Not really though.
madkatter117 0
Don't just play solitaire! Go kick some of that idiots ass!
Opium_Production 5
You fail at life to lose that many times at solitaire.
jessyrodgers 0
cause you use so many solitaire skills in life
a_nutritionist 10
indirectly...yes.
onthetoilet 3
I guess they didn't show?
promarkchris 6
...
BumbleChick 18
So.....did you go on the date?