Today, I was so sleep deprived that while making instant oatmeal, I poured the oats into the garbage and put the empty packet in a bowl, then microwaved it for 2 minutes. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was so tired at work that I stared at the microwave waiting for my food. It was a full minute before I realized I'd never actually turned it on after I'd put the food in it. FML
Today, I put leftovers in the microwave, pressed two minutes, and walked away. I came back to discover I'd started the kitchen timer instead. I'd spent two minutes waiting for food that had never even started warming up. FML
Today, I got out of my bed and immediately stepped into a half-eaten bowl of cereal. FML
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
Today, I put leftovers in the microwave and pressed what I thought was “1:00.” It was actually “10:00.” I got distracted, then realized at minute eight when the smell changed from “warm food” to “bad science experiment.” FML
Today, I made a big pot of soup for the week and portioned it into containers. So, on my very first day trying this out, I took one to work and heated it up. I'd somehow not put the lid on properly before putting it in my bag. I spent my lunch break cleaning soup chunks out of my backpack. FML
Today, I started a new job and wanted to seem organized, so I brought a homemade lunch in a container. I went to heat it up, but forgot to remove the lid completely. The container exploded in the microwave, covering the inside with sauce. I spent my lunch break cleaning it while my coworkers smirked. FML
Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML
Today, I choked on oatmeal, watered-down soupy oatmeal. It seemed to get stuck halfway down. I chucked up several spoonfuls. My wife was oblivious to all the noise I was making because she had her over-the-ear headphones on, listening to some stupid YouTube video. FML
Today, I attempted meal prepping to “get my life together.” Within an hour I'd burned rice, melted a plastic spatula, and discovered I’d seasoned chicken with powdered sugar instead of salt. My smoke alarm and my stomach filed complaints. FML
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Top comments
ananicosia 28
Did you enjoy your bowl of disappointment for breakfast?
IDontKnowWhoIAm04 24
Most important meal of the day!
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Comments (32)
cmdd 5
#9 & #12 - Ya why not try a dangerous and addictive drug. That makes more sense than just trying to get more sleep or going to the doctor if you can't. Great advice.
lantz4levi 19
Or how bout it was a joke? But that makes to much sense
kayayye 22
literally something I would do.
914smv 18
u gotta it!!! maybe eat cereal?
M3DO 24
You need to rest. A lot.
zaidthunder1 27
Were you high? Because that would explain it.
Imhere4fml 24
Reading is fun
allforfun 23
The more you know...
suffermyname 15
Drink cold water when you first wake up!
KayleeFrye 39
A lot of us are sleep deprived and manage to avoid doing things like this. At least it was a minor mistake. I hope you don't drive a car until you've had a few hours sleep.
oasis359 13
mmm fiber.
pyrestriker 6
My cousin once did something close, but with ramen - he forgot the water. 6 minutes in the microwave later needed a fire extinguisher.
katydid91 31
I bet that smelled absolutely awesome. Nothing tops the smell of incinerated ramen noodles.
prettygurl89 16
Know the feeling