Today, I was handling corrosive chemicals when I accidentally spilled a beaker of Hydrochloric Acid on myself. I had to strip naked and use the emergency shower with my boss and my hot coworker watching. The worst part was when I realized my coworker was laughing at the size of my penis. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out how acidic some of the chemicals I work with are. After a chemical shower, minor burns, and having to throw away my clothes due to a biohazard, I had the pleasure of running across the parking lot to my car, wearing only a lab coat around my waist. FML
Today, I had to take out the grease traps from our fryers. A very rude co-worker cut me off, so I had to abruptly stop and try to prevent as much spilling as possible. Luckily, it only spilled on me. I'm here for six more hours with burned, smelly, greasy spots all over my skin and clothes. FML
Today, as I was walking to wash my hands after using the restroom, the guy walking away from the sink flicked water from his hands towards the floor. Water splashed all over my beige shorts. I had to walk back into class looking like I'd peed my pants. FML
Today, I took a piss while doing yard work. Later, to my horror, I discovered that I had touched poison oak at some point. My penis is now blistered and swollen. FML
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I purposefully spilt my 44oz. cup of water on myself at work, because spending the rest of the day in soaking wet pants was less embarrassing than letting people know I'd pissed myself. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML
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Top comments
fuzzyface73 2
Yeah, women just don't understand shrinkage.
RiverRelic 0
You have a pretty valid complaint to make to HR. Of course, you then have to keep reliving the humiliation but that was pretty unprofessional on her part. (You may also have misinterpretted her laughter. Was it from nervousness? Some people do that. )
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Comments (220)
Roxas_fml 0
You should've slapped that bitch with your penis. She wouldn't be laughing after that.
Signposthead 0
Shoulda jacked off to her.
Avaquin 0
lol
coheedandcambria 0
Ydi cuz I like turtles
doof_fisch 2
You should have kicked her in the acid.
muchhate 0
Fake. Why would you strip naked? Boxers?
athos1237 4
I call bullshit! Never happened, major fail.
MAjOR_EPiC_FAiL 0
not fake. any person who has ever been in a chem or bio lab knows that YOU MUST strip down and remove ANYTHING that was touched by the chemical as well as be able to wash everything that has been touched. SO to you dumb uneducated fools. boxers were OBVIOUSLY not an option. duh.
BSPiotr 0
I'm not sure which is more sad and scary. Your carelessness and the fact you aren't horribly scarred (and instead worried about something you're not 100% sure about) or the people here who have no idea about anything to do with chemistry replying to this.
AmericansAreDumb 0
You said it.
jnic 0
Yes, because EVERY GIRL IN THE WORLD makes fun of guys' penis size, and gets her physical features made fun of in return and bitches hypocritically. Now stop whining.
electroboy_fml 0
You're not the OP, are you?
beckyb 0
It depends on the standard procedure of the lab, how concentrated the HCl was and how much was in the beaker. A large amount of highly concentrated HCl would warrant stripping off you clothes and taking an emergency shower.
timtam24 0
haha biggest dick in the world 13" thats like a bit bigger than a ruler. Sucks for him though coz girls can only handle 12" lol.
HellBorn 0
#140 is right. Any man that had acid spilled on him, was in a cold shower and had people standing around watching would be suffering from serious shrinkage.
jnic 0
12 inches, you kidding me?! A normal vag can't fit any more than 5-6 inches... MAYBE 7. if you gave me anything over 8 inches my ****** might leap out of my body and run away screaming. And the vast majority of guys don't have anything over 7 inches, so nothing to worry about really. Guys think girls care way more about size than they actually do.
mcsnelly 5
140-Do you realize that most people who are obsessed with penis size are men, not women? Most women do not care NEARLY as much about size as men do. And most women are NOT expecting it to be huge, like, apparently, a lot of men think they are. Also, does the OP actually KNOW that the co-worker was laughing at the size of his penis? Because I think most people would be laughing at the situation (someone having to all of a sudden strip down and run into the emergency shower) rather than fixating on penis size...It might seem kind of insensitive that she'd be laughing at him spilling dangerous chemicals but maybe she could tell he wasn't horribly burned? Idk I'm just wondering here...If that's not the case then that is kind of mean...until they're sure he wasn't seriously hurt..THEN laugh it off..lol