Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML
Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be spontaneous and do something sexy. I started taking his underwear off with my teeth. My teeth dragged over his shaft, and my braces cut up his foreskin in the process. Now he's not talking to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to pull down my panties with his teeth but it proved more difficult than he thought, so he got a real good mouthful and gave it a really hard pull. They did come down, but he also pulled out what felt like half my pubes. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML
Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML
Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML
Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents and everything was going perfectly. He and I even had some time alone upstairs, where I gave him a blowjob. After dinner, his mom helpfully pointed out something stuck in my braces and inspected it for me. It was a pube. FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML
Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
yeezheng 6
I bet your braces must have hurt your girlfriend. I feel sorry for her instead of you OP. A large chunk of pubes rip out is no joke.
maddy23a 5
Nice one ace
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (416)
DarkGem 13
If you have braces you're too young to be having sex anyways
kickass1954 14
How old are you? I mean ouch
magnetic_aura 26
Might have been a little ambitious for your first time... But, at least that's a good way to introduce and discuss grooming preferences. Good luck!
denica 6
Ew. Omg ew
thatnewgirl 16
I did something similar but I cut my ex boyfriends foreskin with my braces when I was dating him. as far as I know he's still bleeding from it
lovinloki 9
I mean some people do get them later but for the most part if you've still got braces you're a bit young to be doin stuff like that
lovinlife028 24
I know this is an old FML but I gotta just say that OP deserved it for the following reasons: 1. You used the word "intimate." Girls don't like that shit. It gives us the creeps. 2. You attempted to take off panties with teeth, which isn't romantic, but even more creepy than #1.