Animals: Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling....

By fuckendog - 25/07/2014 06:05 - Australia - Virginia

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 227

You deserved it 55 759

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

As a treat

By Undercooked - 24/09/2013 19:08 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 079

You deserved it 4 767

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 04:07 - United States

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 417

You deserved it 54 826

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 05/10/2013 20:23 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 077

You deserved it 8 753

By Anonymous - 04/08/2016 21:25

Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 995

You deserved it 15 564

By Face - 09/01/2010 10:12 - Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 344

You deserved it 34 733

And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 034

You deserved it 7 724

By FishFlingingMonkey - 22/08/2015 03:55 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I was eating and my dog kept bothering me. She kept scratching my legs for food, so I took a large piece of fish from my plate and tossed it out into the hallway. It flew right into my mother's face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 299

You deserved it 8 115

Tasty!

By Andrew Williams - 12/01/2023 06:00

Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 769

By FrozenAnonymus - 14/07/2016 18:05 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 1 520

Dangerous words

By lily - 30/08/2009 20:17 - United States

Today, my friend and I were making sandwiches at his house. His family's dog wandered over just as I dropped a large chunk of cheddar on the floor. The dog snatched it up and ran away with it. I yelled after it, jokingly, that I hoped it would choke and die. It did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 143

You deserved it 54 636

1dvs_bstd 41

Friday 25 July 2014 16:33

Smart and strategic by your dog. Drooled for you to fall. it was intentional, i tells ya.

Leodak 16

Friday 25 July 2014 16:33

Don't be a dick to your dog then.

Comments

Aero_x 21

Friday 25 July 2014 17:56

my dog understands the words, "you want some food?" and gets super excited when you say that. my sister teases her all the time without giving her anything and I feel so bad that I end up giving her treats :3 YDI! I know I hate false hope!

katina1236 20

Friday 25 July 2014 17:59

Karmas a bitch. Smart dog though. I just have to yell loud and my dog won't eat anything off the floor

Dodger_fan16 11

Friday 25 July 2014 18:15

How do you know he wasn't going to give the dog any towards the end? That's what I do. I eat my food and give my dog some scraps at the end. You can't just assume he wasn't going to give the dog any.

amisenho 11

Friday 25 July 2014 18:21

I think this is what they call poetic justice. Your dog knew what she was doing.

worldclassrager 39

Friday 25 July 2014 18:45

Well she may leave you alone now...she got what she wanted

kennedia 18

Friday 25 July 2014 18:53

Karma!

KenzieRose77 15

Friday 25 July 2014 19:57

Karma's a bitch, OP

russfml 31

Friday 25 July 2014 20:20

Dog 1 human 0 lmao ydi

pkts11 16

Friday 25 July 2014 20:23

Karma

ashes_ha_ha 1

Friday 25 July 2014 20:33

Oh, OP, that is a bummer. I hope you didn't get hurt when you slipped. I hope your dog is okay too. I just recently learned that pork can increase the dog's chance of getting pancreatitis.