Today, I was awoken by my wife, once again. It seems that whenever I stop snoring, she thinks I died so she has to wake me to make sure I'm still living. She does this almost every night, every hour. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
When you're in a dream…
Today, I woke up at 3 a.m. because my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. I went off to the guest room to try to get back to sleep. Eventually I fell back asleep. Then I had a dream that my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. It woke me up. FML
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML
Human! I request petting!
Today, my cat has made a habit of waking me and my husband up every morning by meowing in front of our bedroom door until we get up. This morning, I finally got her to stop, so I went back to bed hoping to sleep in for a while… Only to be kept awake by my husband’s snoring. FML
The good son
Today, as I was taking care of my mom while my dad was at work, she fell asleep. This would be fine, except she has one of the worst cases of sleep apnea ever recorded. Her snores are so loud, they almost sound like gunshots. I can't leave her alone or block out the sound in case she stops breathing for too long. FML
Today, and for the past four years, the only time my husband stops snoring while asleep is so that he can fart. FML
Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML
Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML
Zzzzzzzz
Today, after months of living with my roommate's horrific snoring, I looked over to see her sleeping quietly. Elated that I might actually get a full night of rest for once, I went to bed. Just as my eyelids began to droop, she started making vile hissing sounds. Yes, hissing. FML
Hush
Today, and like every day before it, my boyfriend’s snoring is keeping me up all night. FML
Top comments
Purpl3_Ninja 5
At least she cares :D
ChucktheNorris 0
Well at least you won't die now..
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Comments (140)
daftPunKt 4
Or she could just check your pulse, without waking you up. Pass it along.
Aweh_Olivia 13
Oh gosh, I'd get soooo mad. :/.
sickenedwinter86 0
Thats rough... Mine wakes me up to tell me Im snoring as if I have some sort of on/off switch in a similar manner...
Fountainel 0
Did you tell her to not be a retard and just watch your chest go up and down so she doesn't have to wake you up.
gillette_sharp 0
This is mad funny & reminds me of a joke..why did she wake up wit 2 black eyes?...bc I told her twice!!! *shows both fists
kitsune3 20
Suck it up, OP. At least she cares enough to make sure. It means SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU TO DIE. Quit bitching like a little 5-year-old and count yourself lucky. Plenty of people have relationships in which their partners don't give a shit.
ame_franky 0
she loves you merry Christmas. have your tonsils removed
yazzy101 11
Well at least she checks
Omgallan 0
Pppppmn
nvo 6
Are you sure it's not the other way around? She wakes you up so you STOP snoring? And then she doesn't want to hurt your feelings and twists the story around?