Today, I was at the movies with my mom and dad, and the preview to my "My Sisters Keeper" came on. The trailer started out with "Most babies are accidents..." Right as that line was finished my mom elbowed me and laughed. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML
Today, during the trailers at the movies, my boyfriend elbowed me in the ribs and smiled when an ad for a weight loss institute was shown. FML
Today, in a big argument, my sister uninvited my mom to her wedding. Trying to comfort my mom, I rented Mamma Mia knowing she's wanted to see it for a while. Turns out, Mamma Mia is a mother/daughter feel-good about the daughters wedding. I had no idea, and my mom cried the whole movie. FML
Today, I went to watch the Movie "UP." At one point in the movie I got really sad and started to cry a bit. The 7 year old girl next to me noticed and told me to shut and man up. FML
Today, I was at the theatre with my 4-year-old son who was situated on my lap. Halfway through the movie, he turns to face me and states loudly, "Mommy, your legs are so furry!". Everyone watching the show turned and stared at us. FML
Today, while babysitting a young girl, I put on the movie Bambi, as she told me it was her favorite movie. I didn't know that her parents always skipped the scene where Bambi's mom dies. Despite my attempts to comfort her, she was still upset when her parents returned. Her mom blamed me. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with my parents. During a sex scene, my dad covered my eyes. I'm married and have 2 kids. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML
Today, my mom and I were watching this movie in which some girls start making out. My mother called them "sinners" claiming they'll "burn in hell twice". Then she said, "God doesn't like gays." I'm a lesbian. I picked out this movie as a way of coming out. FML
Today, I went to the movies. Two teenagers behind me had already seen the picture once and shared the entire plot with their friend during first 10 minutes. The finale was intended to be a great twist and I knew it from the very beginning. FML
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Top comments
xOpheliacx 0
So? I was an accident, too. It doesn't mean your parents don't love you or something.
stringoffail 0
I think I was an accident too. Why else would my middle name be "Vasectomy"?
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Comments (182)
bettyboop274 0
Trust me, that's not as bad as what I've gotten told. Not only was I a mistake, but apparently I was the reason for my mom and dad's break up, in the harsh words of my father. Yay me.
cough 0
lol good one mom
jazmino15 0
thats how your mom told you ? wow , she could not have said that in a worse way , I was too but damn i didnt find out like that!!
gallor 0
How is that an FML?
frozenpandaman 0
LOL oh shit
thatbloke 0
Most babies are "accidents". That doesn't mean your parents don't love you. It's good that you have parents with a sense of humour
aero930 0
That really sucks. But that doesn't mean they don't want you. Don't freak out about their mistakes in the past. You're lucky your parent's take the time to see a movie with you.
live_your_life_fml 0
she's obviously kidding!!
dan81892 2
YDI for not being able to take a joke.
salha 0
i'd nudge my mom first