Intimacy: Today, I wanted to wake up my sweetheart with a surprise blowjob....

By Soline - 08/12/2008 12:05 - France

Today, I wanted to wake up my sweetheart with a surprise blowjob. He surprised me as well with a knee to the stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 224

You deserved it 9 033

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Same thing different taste

Make your mind up!

By nextcontestant16 - 19/11/2012 15:12 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 551

You deserved it 5 099

Heavy sleeper

By good_aim - 27/07/2013 08:03 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 296

You deserved it 26 888

By Anonymous - 24/05/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, I was lying on the couch with my boyfriend and was feeling tired, so I got a soda. I sat back down and surprised him with a passionate kiss. I also surprised him when I suddenly burped right into his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 183

You deserved it 47 566

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 943

You deserved it 14 580

Freudian slip

By MollyMadamme - 01/02/2011 00:33

Today, I decided to wake my fiancé up by giving him a blowjob. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 953

You deserved it 6 349

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 05:52 - United States

Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling romantic, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 855

You deserved it 27 885

By anonymaiacciu - 22/12/2012 01:16 - France

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 786

You deserved it 8 951

By Anonymous - 07/04/2015 21:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 999

You deserved it 4 667

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 034

You deserved it 3 378

That was quick

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 12:03 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 550

You deserved it 6 818

inlimbo11 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 8:24

#6 scary? really? i remember it to be the best way i've ever woken up. just keep your body over the bed next time, not his legs...

ilaaFML 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 2:14

speaking from experience? haha

Comments

inestimable_fml 8

Thursday 9 December 2010 19:09

Is he undercover or something?

Ohmygiluvcookies 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 19:48

if you try to give someone a surprise while their sleep, it's always a bad idea!

jess6blondie9 2

Friday 8 April 2011 11:53

Honestly... YDI.

Fruit_Dealer 9

Sunday 24 April 2011 8:08

Thpse french girls are all crazy. I know it cause I myself am french :)

fortgarrison 1

Thursday 5 May 2011 15:10

surprise abortion

Natty23 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:07

next time you give him a bj suprize wake him up by "sweet heart wake up, I'm going to hive you something special" then go for a bj

Flocka_23 14

Monday 19 September 2011 6:35

Lol sucks... Did you still give him one???

restl3ss 6

Wednesday 15 August 2012 6:27

You'd be surprised how many fmls there are like this. YDI. "rape reflux". He was asleep. Look it up.

ScenicSubterfuge 39

Sunday 28 April 2013 15:45

My girlfriend does crap like that all the time!! I'll wake up to go down on her and she'll accidentally knew me in the chest or something>.

pandamaster19 3

Saturday 14 September 2013 0:56

well that SUCKS *Ba sum tssss*

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I agree, your life sucks 22 017

You deserved it 8 468

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You deserved it 3 031