Today, I updated my Facebook status to "It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood." My cousin, seeing the status, failed to pick up on the sarcastic humor. She called all my family members and tell them that I was pregnant. Including my husband in Iraq. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I saw his newly updated Facebook status, which read, "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML
Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML
Today, my parents posted on Facebook that they were excited that my sister was pregnant and couldn't wait to be grandparents. Last week I told them that I, a 33-year-old happily married woman, was pregnant and they told me I was ruining my life and encouraged me to have an abortion. FML
Today, my attention-seeking sister-in-law came to my 20 week ultrasound and afterward, without my knowledge, took it upon herself to announce the gender to Facebook and call the entire family, telling them "we're having a boy" nullifying any need for the announcement I had spent 4 weeks planning. FML
Today, as a joke, I put a picture of a sonogram on my girlfriend's Facebook. Now her entire family hates me, and her mother has started the two-hour drive to come pull her out of college. Whoops. FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
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Top comments
Daaniellee1234 8
I dont even see the sarcastic humor in this. What an asshole of a cousin aswell.
lettertjes 0
I don't see the humour either. Can someone explain the joke to me?
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Comments (108)
Baller_Bob 17
Your cousin is an idiot
cwl727 33
Ok so I get the sarcasm but was there an ongoing joke that made you post it because if not it is your fault for not explaining anything.
zykrithium 22
She's a ****, sure, but I fail to see the sarcasm.
Nat52482 25
"Unplanned" because a lot of people who go there, go there because they unexpectedly got pregnant and are going to see their options.
rinzlerkitty94 31
Family can be a bitch sometimes.
DKING123456789 16
I would be her ass
n4mt4r 12
what a stunned **** your cousin Is
sharond23 10
I don't understand why you call that sarcastic humor. if id read your status I would have immediately thought you were pregnant. ydi