Today, I spent 3 hours trying to close a simple $400 deal with a homeowner. He spent 3 hours telling me about his life story including his marital problems, his philosophical views of the world, AND he read me 20 pages of haiku poems. Only 3 hours later did he tell me he couldn't accept my deal. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I finally finished painting a house that took me 3 weeks to complete at 10 hours a day, including weekends, due to my dedication to perfection. When I went to meet with the homeowner for pay day, which was supposed to be $2000, he gave me $200, 5 tacos and then told me to "get the f*** off my lawn." FML
Retail work hell
Today, I greeted a customer with my usual “Hi, how are you?” She started telling me, in detail, about the terrible day she was having, job stress, family issues, everything. I stood there for 10 minutes listening because I didn’t want to be rude. At the end, she sighed, “Thanks, I’m not buying anything today” and left. FML
My man
Today, my man complained about having to listen to my "emotional problems for hours." Yeah, we did talk for two hours, 90% of which was him asking for my advice on which new mattress to buy for his bed. FML
Kinda sus
Today, after days of working with a client on plans for a project, I received a message halfway through completion, saying the deal was off because my prices were "so low, it seems like a scam." FML
Today, I was closing the deal on this beautiful $200k ranch in the country. The buyer soon pulls up and we get to discussing the contract terms, soon the buyer asks the seller," Wow why is this house going so cheap?" The seller replies, "Do you believe in ghosts?" There goes my $8,000 commission. FML
Long goodbye
Today, I got a call from a potential employer. They spent five minutes explaining job duties and I listened with anticipation. Then they spent five minutes explaining why I wasn't the right person for the job. FML
Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML
Please leave
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow some tools. Trying to be friendly, I asked how he was doing. He then spent the next 45 minutes describing his recent breakup in excruciating detail. I just wanted him to take the tools and leave. FML
Today, I submitted an offer on a house. I got a call a few minutes later saying that it had collapsed. FML
Technique
Today, I was working at our garage sale with my dad. I sat outside for 2 hours, talked to three people, and sold nothing. My dad came outside and got angry at me, so I told him to give it a shot. He sold 3 things to the first guy who walked in. FML
Top comments
John_Failer 0
"All these dumb haikus. Would you just accept my deal? Oh hell, **** my life."
p89hg69 0
guess he's pretty lonely
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Comments (70)
STN_fml 0
hahaa
cyxx 0
hahahahaha #4
AsianGuy 2
hopefully you get paid by the hrs.
AsianGuy 2
hopefull you get paid by the hr..
mf_fml 0
oh...god.
yumyum_isacult 0
I tend to encounter the same problems here at my job. they pick your brain for like 2 and half hours and end up not buying that $600 product or end up buying it at home depot. i work at a small family owned hardware store. fyl
mon_e_mons 0
XD what an ass.
BigLord 0
#7 you're a bartender? FYL :/
yumyum_isacult 0
I tend to encounter the same problems here at my job. they pick your brain for like 2 and half hours and end up not buying that $600 product or end up buying it at home depot. i work at a small family owned hardware store. fyl
mrcarmine 0
uhhh what were you trying to sell him?