Today, I rear-ended a car on the parkway. We pulled over, the guy told me his car was fine, and then asked me out on a date. It was only when I said no that he decided he wanted his car fixed. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I got rear ended. The guy flashed his lights at me to pull over, so I pulled into the side of the road. He drove away. FML
Today, I decided to be a good driver and not run through the yellow light. As soon as I stopped my car another came and rear-ended me. The guy told me to go in the parking lot so we can exchange information. So I drove into the parking lot, I turned my head and watched him drive away. FML
Today, I went on a date. We met in the parking lot of a restaurant. As I approached his car he took one look at me, said "Nope", and drove off. FML
Today, I noticed I parked behind a boy I like. Trying to impress him with my driving skills, I ended up forgetting to put the car in reverse and rear-ended him. FML
Today, I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for half an hour. The entire time, a man I had gone on a date with and that had gotten very out of hand with, was sitting in the car next to me. I noticed, panicked, and tried to drive off, rear-ending the car in front of me. FML
Today, I was driving home when a guy crashed into me from behind. I got out of my car and told him that I was going to call the cops. He then asked me if we could move to a corner because we were blocking the way, so we then got back in to move. I looked in the mirror to see him driving off. FML
Today, a guy's car broke down in my street, so I helped him push it into my driveway, checked his car out, and gave it a jump start. He thanked me, then as he went to pull out, he instead smashed straight into my car. FML
Today, I was driving around a parking lot, looking for an empty spot. Someone was backing out a bit too quickly as I was about to pass by, so I honked to announce myself. The driver instead panicked and reversed into my front bumper. FML
Today, while driving, I got a call on my cell phone. Trying to be safe and avoid an accident, I pulled into the nearest parking lot before answering. While I was turning in to park, someone rear-ended me. FML
Today, I rear-ended a car. While we were waiting for the police, we made small talk, at which point I learned that he was an attorney. FML
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Top comments
Daaniellee1234 8
Since he saved you a chunk of money (depending on how bad the damage was) You should have kindly gone on a date with him.
lol69_fml 0
All he wanted was to rear end your bumper if you know what I mean
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Comments (145)
ladiesman14 0
dame your a lesbian ? is it true that 30 % of the time lesbians think about guys ? if so im much harder and taste better than a strap on. call me cause i think your a hottie.
DameGreyWulf 1
Well, to be anal I'm pretty sure a fake dick is technically harder than a real dick. And your semen and precum probably taste pretty acrid from all that drugs an alcohol you must be on. I wouldn't know anything about lesbian statistics since I'm not one, but I would think anyone with a brain could see either 1) you made that up to try and stir shit, or 2) some desperate horny dude made it up because he was tired of the chicks he hit on only liking other chicks, so he thought it up to get back at them or something along those lines... or a pissed off straight chick did it to try and prove some agenda. Weirder shit has been made up... (hairy palms, anyone?) Anyway... Mmm, baby~ My panties are blue tonight Like your balls
ladiesman14 0
oh im sooo sorry for being stupid Dame. i dont do drugs but i do drink alot of wine and hard liquor. no girls have complained about my precum or semen before. and its been in alot of mouths, vaginas, butts, and faces. except yours but maybe someday. :) im hoping with fingers crossed.
DameGreyWulf 1
[yawn] Sure, okay. How about we meet in a back alley in downtown Chicago?
youthink_fml 0
How can it not be your own fault? You rear-ended somebody. Learn how to drive.
MaggieB_fml 0
You should have said yes and gave him a fake number...! lol
ehza 0
#81 take an english course
dangletsbang21 0
hha, sucks to be you!
newmanlyman3 8
learn to write
Lib4evar24 0
what's a parkway?
Lib4evar24 0
WHAT THE **** IS A PARKWAY?!?!?!!?!?!?! I KEEP SEEING THE WORD EVERY WHERE BUT I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS!!!!!!
elusivepoison 0
your face is a parkway o_O!!!!
Nadinek98 0
I usually like to read the comments but they are really long.. :