Today, I realized that the reason there is no toilet paper in the house is because both my parents are too stubborn to be the one who goes out to buy more. It's been five days. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Cheapskate
Today, my entire family of five is sharing one roll of toilet paper. My parents refuse to buy any, because my father can get it free from his work. He's forgotten to bring any home every day without fail for the past seven days. FML
Today, after a day, I finally noticed that the toilet paper I'd been using to wipe my butt is actually a roll of paper towel cut in half. My dad thinks that it's a waste of money to buy proper paper. Guess who had to unclog the toilet twice. FML
"Shit ticket for one"
Today, my household ran out of toilet paper so we have to shower after every dump. My mom just confessed that she does in fact have money for shit tickets, but won't buy any because it's the only way she can get my brother to shower. FML
Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML
Dad priorities
Today, as he was going out, I asked my father if he stop by the store and buy some tampons for me and toilet paper for the house, because we have been out for the last 5 days. He came home with a 30-pack of beer and cigarettes instead. I just started my time of the month and we have no more money. FML
Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML
Always check before
Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML
Today, my dad hid the toilet paper and is charging me 50 cents a roll. FML
Shit for brains
Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML
Today, I was moving into my new apartment. I moved in a couple of bags and realized I really needed to poop. It’s been 10 minutes since I realized I hadn’t brought the toilet paper in yet. No one to bring me any. FML
Top comments
duckie227 22
Buy a roll for yourself and keep it in your room
taytoc 10
Put laxatives in their drinks. It'll force them to buy toilet paper or else.
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Comments (185)
imavelociraptor 6
Well here's an idea.. why don't YOU buy some toilet paper???
kimg0885 23
If they have an iPhone to post this they can but tp
sgcaudell 27
Maybe they posted from their computer using the website?
BubbaJ80 11
Get off your ass and go buy some yourself
MustacheOlive 0
I don't but TP, I steal it from bars!
Linkerdoodles 15
That could be a shitty situ— *gets brutally murdered with a rusty, dull knife by FML community*
lively12 0
Use water
raf2010 1
Crap. I wonder which one of my children posted this?
Ray_of_midnight 23
Or get yourself to the store, buy some TP, and embarrass the (pardon the pun) shit out of both of them for their juvenile behavior. Failing that, drink a whole lot of caffeine, pull your t-shirt over your head, and run around in front of your parents shouting "I AM THE GREAT CORNHOLIO! I NEED T.P. FOR MY BUNGHOLE!"
supermegafoxy 6
Epic winnage.
caviar_fml 2
ydi. go buy it yourself!
gabrayal 10
Take a shower right after you're done .