Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, and I really started getting into it. I said, "Hang on tight, this is gonna get intense." She replied, "Doubt it" and yawned. FML
Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Actor's Studio
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML
Repetitive
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML
Really into it
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML
Top comments
feldco1 17
Unless she has tried to tell you what to work on, it's really her fault. Communication is key with this stuff.
MeLikeBigBoom 8
Well your username explains it quite a bit...
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Comments (89)
icepick23 12
Try sucking her toes
SirCharles83 13
31- Safe to say you have a foot fetish?
LarryLaDouche 13
They're better than hands
CuhlorRed 7
No. There Not.
Cupcake040 17
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh no don't suck her toes...........that's a lil gross
firefighter925 18
reverse cowgirl works everytime
Enslaved 38
Apparently **** has taught her nothing either or she could have faked her ****** better.
amDes 11
Are you sure she wasn't just tired? Im pretty sure I have fallen asleep during sex just for a minute while I was drunk by accident. Doesn't mean you're bad in bed.
Vicanlp 10
First, like a lot of people have said, communication is key, so talk to your girlfriend about it, and tell her that you want to do better. Hopefully she'll help you out by telling you what she likes. My biggest tip, though, is to read quality erotica. Read lots of it, from all different types of genres and pairings, and look for patterns in what the characters (doesn't have to be the male one) do to each other, and how the other reacts. THAT will teach you something. And since it will most likely be written by a woman - although there are probably a lot of male erotica authors out there, too - you'll get the female perspective, instead of the male-centric, skewed view of sex that **** has. And when I say erotica, I don't mean bodice-rippers or Fifty Shades. Stay away from that - that's worse than ****. Quality erotica does exist, and it's great. I learned all my theoretical knowledge about sex from erotica, and I'm a woman - I already know how my own body works, but reading those stories taught me a thing or two. So maybe pass them on to your girlfriend when you're done. Who knows, maybe she's not that great at sex either, which is why she hasn't told you what she wanted - because she doesn't know. Either way, good luck, OP. Go forth and prosper.
firefighter925 18
I didmt even read ur post. its so damn long!!! so I thumbed it down
teamlightskin 14
I agree. And you should experiment with your technique, and closely watch her reactions so that you will know what she likes. It wouldnt hurt if she gave feedback. She doesnt have to be mean about it! All she has to do is say ok now try it this way, or i love it when you ______ Good luck next time OP
j_cat187 20
He needs to give her the full length French baguette.
CanCann 16
Maybe you're so good that she went for it even though she was exhausted? Or you're so good that you put her to sleep! A yawn in itself is t necessarily a bad thing. Not the most pleasant to see during those moments but it can mean something good.
7yzz 18
Wow. Trying way too hard to try and comfort the OP. No. Just no.
Knightophonix_fml 1
Your nickname made me hit YDI.
scottyrocks123 21
Hahah love your user name OP! And you'll get better.