Weird. How'd you end up in Iran?

I told Jimmy we should have gone right!

It would be really weird if he was cheating or something.

It's this amazing thing. I invented it last week it's called.

"Teleportation"

It's how you can get from one place to another instantly.

For example: I kicked a 300lb mma fighter in the shin. I teleported a few feet backwards.

Another example: I was playing a game. Got knocked out and teleported to the hospital.

true story bro.

he just wants his ice cream and cake too! and his cookies, and his brownies...

I hope you're doing okay after an event like that. keep your head high, you will find the right guy eventually. good luck :)

Wow. That sucks, sorry OP

I must say, and not that it makes it less sucky for OP, but most guys don't have the energy to put into a legitimate relationship for 5 years. it takes a hell of a man to maintain a wife and kids and have the wherewithal to put even more effort into a side piece, for *5* years.

You're an asshole

Obviously she drove from Virginia to Iran, Duh!

I like how you're giving that advice with that profile picture.

#1 your an idiot she's not in Iran

OP said the boyfriend was SUPPOSED to be in Iran, meaning neither of them are.

Is it a bird? is it a plane? no it's the joke #95...

He's... G-O-N-E-

I guess 11 year olds like #92 who shouldn't be on here anyways, don't understand a joke.

I'm fairly sure you're too young to fully understand what's going on here. Even 11 year old me would have been able to catch the sarcasm in that joke.

Your the idiot, you couldn't understand sarcasm...

You're*

Idiot she's not in Iran

Loool! How did she end up in Iran? Like that is the most fascinating thing about his story, what about the wife and five kids?

That's a good question

Or ya know. If they have the username impretty

What the actual fuck.

I feel bad for his wife and kids of and when they found out. Total dick

Not the theoretical fuck?

Well, a theoretical fuck wouldn't have resulted in children.

60, you just made me laugh in a silent room full of people. Good job

60, Props for that man, funny

tell his wife! otherwise he will keep doing it..

for sure. she's probably not the only one. I just feel bad for the children.

what in the flying fuck is wrong with him?

Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry op.. That's very effed up. Dump him immediately. And tell his wife that he's been seeing you on the side and that you didn't know. Then that son of a bitch will end up alone and pay child support =)

lol, "dump him immediately"
I think that was taken care of right then and there.

Never underestimate the stupidity in some people

I think this needs a follow up

Holy shit... I wonder what you did afterwards!

8- They both played a game of pool with his nuts.
One say, "I break," the other say,"ok, Iraq."

My goodness. Another family broken up.

WTF...Nuke his ass, that he wishes he was really in Iran.
The saddest thing is the poor kids.

Yeah , you should make HIM run.