Today, I put on a pair of sneakers that I'd left outside, and went jogging. After several minutes of pain, I pulled off one of the sneakers, only to find dozens of baby spiders had moved in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML
Today, I put my house shoes on without socks, but felt a rock in them. I shook it free and out dropped a half-crushed roach. FML
Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML
Today, while bringing boxes up from the basement, I noticed a few spider egg sacs had stuck to my shirt. As I desperately tried to remove them, they hatched. FML
Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
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Top comments
MikeDa1Da 14
Check your old underpants for the momma spider
ICATiger 13
That's why you don't leave stuff outside.
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Comments (201)
ChocolateToast 0
And you didnt spaz out. Damn you got balls
Go_Away_141998 4
You're never more that three feet away from a spider. make that three millimeters.
ksvm 2
BURN IT!
dinosaurzombie 14
Why did you leave your shoes outside in the first place?
Mabonga 12
slow poison..
hayleyannah 15
I don't know about other countries but in Australia everybody grows up knowing you ALWAYS check your shoes before you put them on your feet, especially if you left them outside.
lovely_1818 15
I hate spiders more than just about anything. It gets to the point where I run away screaming. If spiders ever gain the ability to fly I am leaving this planet. FYL.