Today, I moved to a big city, alone, from a small town. After convincing myself it wasn't that scary, I hailed my first cab. The driver spent the 30 minute ride from the airport telling me about how "sometimes, you just gotta shoot a guy" because if they steal your shoes, they deserve it. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, it's my first day as an expat. Hoping to arrive early for work, I hailed a cab. The driver took it upon himself to take the scenic route and play tour guide, no matter how much I refused. Not only was I late, he turned violent when I refused to pay his $100 fare plus a "talent fee." FML
Today, I was finally leaving my hometown to live in my dream city. Everything was packed, keys were handed in, goodbyes were made. The moment my truck began pulling out to get underway, the guy I'd gotten a room from in my new city called to inform me that he'd decided to rent to someone else. FML
Today, I rode in the cab on the way back to my dorm from the airport. The taxi driver was on the phone and not really paying attention. I paid him and got out of the cab, but he drove away before I could get my luggage out of the trunk. FML
Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML
Today, I called a taxi after a night of partying. When it arrived, I realised I had no cash, so I told the driver I'd quickly grab some from an ATM. He made me leave my phone with him as collateral in case I was pulling a prank. He drove off the moment I turned my back. FML
Today, I got chased, threatened and assaulted by a cab driver because I wouldn't take the credit card receipt. FML
Today, I got a taxi home from work. Only having notes in my wallet, I told the taxi driver that I'd run inside my house and come back out with the change for the journey. He agreed, but only if I left my bag as collateral. It seemed fair. An hour later, I realized my wallet was missing. FML
Today, I was starting my new job in the city. A man with a torn suit on came up to me and asks me for spare change. In a hurry to catch a taxi, I declined and rushed to catch one. At the office, my boss was late. About an hour later, I found out the man in the suit was my boss. He was attacked. FML
Today, I’d been dying to escape my dreary hometown, but had panic attacks at the thought of being on my own, but at last, I'd found a place I could afford. Turns out, the guy I was going to rent from was just arrested for murdering his last tenant. FML
Today, I took a cab ride home from a bar. After a few minutes of horrible driving, I felt sick. The cab driver got so mad she locked me in the car and started driving me to the cops unless I payed her extra. Basically, I paid $120 for a five-minute cab ride. FML
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Top comments
RobinGoodfellow 47
Congrats, people are crazy.
onlychildFTW 34
Well in Texas they do have fairly liberal gun laws. Nothing wrong with it though, I like Texas; if you're friendly so are they. Just don't be a criminal and you're good. But another note, who would steal someone's used shoes? That'd be pretty gross. I assume they weren't brand new of course.
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Comments (61)
peggscott 14
Just don't steal shit then...
Cozy_Blanket 16
Not even gonna lie that cabbie sounds all kinds of badass!
zykrithium 22
I read the quote in a Brooklyn accent...
alex101676 8
welcome to the city life.
Matheo_fml 21
You are obviously not ready for the BIIIG city...
Nagi 21
"Texas" Now I see…
candyguurl 9
well obviously the guy deserved it so you have nothing to be afraid of . unless ya know , you were that guy .
fader48080 10
Don't they?
newblue 2
Must be in Boston lol
dr_of_dre 8
Who else read the last part in a New York accent