Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. I was playing with his little sister by grabbing her arms and spinning her around. On one turn, she started screaming in pain. It turns out I dislocated both her shoulders. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I met my daughter's first serious boyfriend, only she forgot to mention he has hypermobility. All I did was shaking his hand normally, but it still dislocated three of his knuckles. My daughter made me call his mother to explain what I did. FML
Today, I finally got to see my boyfriend, after two months apart. As we hugged, he lifted me up and spun me around like in the movies. It would have been really romantic if I hadn't hit a little boy while he was riding past on his bike. I've just traumatized a little kid. FML
Today, I told my family how my wrist has been hurting for almost a week. My aunt’s chiropractor boyfriend then decided he could help by suddenly pulling my hand as hard as he could. Not only did my wrist pop and cause me more pain, but my shoulder got dislocated. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. When I went to shake her dad's hand, I broke his watch. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
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Top comments
prttyyngthng 0
That's one HELL of a first impression.
mogan_fml 0
the shoulders are supposed to stay IN the sockets? oh, oh dear.
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Comments (163)
The_F3rris 11
I feel for you OP. You gotta be careful when you play with kids. FYL
dolphins_penny 5
u shouldn't spin he so hard that's she's parallel to the ground. also the worst way to spin a child is by grabbing their hands, u could have broken her arms or worse, let her slip out and hit something. ur suppose to grab them under the armpit and if u spin them, have them facing out so they get the feeling without as much danger. I have to say ydi for not understanding this. but I feel bad cuz it was it first impression
chinagirl3343 8
Holy cow. Either you're stronger than you think or she has joint issues.
Fantasya_fml 6
omg! this made my day, FYL OP, sorry.
Breegotcake 14
I hate when people are rough with children. Especially when it's a parent; you really can't do much about it because it is their child.
imhope 23
Let's hope you never have kids
DestinyNiya 33
Whoaaa. She must have been in terrible pain. OP, next time you plan to spin anyone around, hold them by their waist with both your hands, like, hug them from behind, lift and spin. Get it?
SexyMexi21 23
Well damn BOTH her arms? poor girl. I did that to my little brother but I popped it back in place.
Imstilldreaming 12
That's why you swing them by the shoulders not the arms....most people know this
HUGBUG 23
Dumbass