Today, I let a friend read a draft of the novel I'm writing. She claimed the antagonist is blatantly based on her, and threatened to sue me if I don't pay her royalties. The antagonist is an ancient, insane goblin witch. I guess I see now how this confusion could arise. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML
Today, I ruined a 4-year long friendship over something stupid, and I'm now being ghosted. I tried to fix it several times, but she doesn't care anymore I don't think. Imagine being the antagonist in your own story. FML
Today, after working on my novel for two years, I found out that another book has recently been published with an almost identical plot. I was going to submit it to a publisher in two days. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML
Today, I started a new fantasy romance novel. It was very interesting, but then later I read the plot on Wikipedia and spoiled not just the book but the whole series for myself. Why do I do this? FML
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
Today, we had a meeting at my job and we had to introduce new ideas to our boss. Earlier, I was talking to one of my close friends who also attended the meeting about my idea. As we start the meeting, she decides to steal my idea and take complete credit for it. My boss loves "her" idea. FML
Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML
Today, my ex friend turned half the school against me, saying I stole and damaged her phone, both lies. Things escalated and she threatened to jump me if I didn't apologize. I apologized but now she's making me pay money for something I didn't do, and I'm seriously considering a restraining order. FML
Today, after getting a friend of a friend a job, overnight she turned into Satan, making a job I once loved a hell on earth. I should really try to get to know people before I do them a favor. FML
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Top comments
newburton13 26
I doubt she would want to prove in front of a judge that she's an insane goblin witch, even if she is. You'll be fine.
Catkam623 27
Can you collect royalties from an insane asylum?
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Comments (73)
metalhedcop 6
That being the case, I'd dare her to do it just so she'd make herself look bad lol. Like the first commenter said, she wouldn't wanna make her case in front of a judge.
SchanzE 0
Let me get this straight. This is your "friend" we are talking about here?
sugarbear0727 19
Hmm....tell her no.
TogeBara 12
Tell her that she wouldn't have the honor of being any character in the book, much less the insane goblin witch. I wrote a novel and never published it or anything, but my friends begged me to make a character based on them. She isn't your friend, ditch her, don't look back.
kunlunkid 3
I'd take it as a compliment that she thinks your book is good enough to be published and would be successful enough that any royalties would be significant enough to be worth suing over before a single copy has been printed. Even an insane, ancient goblin queen would have waited for you to reach J.K. Rowling/Stephanie Meyer level of success before threatening to sue.
cho_bee 9
Okay, this is a stretch but run with me on this. First get this woman drunk, real drunk. Then put on a horse costume. You know, the kind of horse that would have sex with an ancient, insane goblin. When she sobers up, tell her you've been inspired to rewrite chapter 2.
Solano2580 24
Just tell her you won't publish it (since royalties are made by publishing it) then tweak the villain, just in case.