By Baustigt - 28/03/2012 11:19 - Australia - Perth

Today, I learned that an inspired gardening spree is not as fulfilling as some would have us believe. One punctured hand, cactussed foot and bruised ankle later, I'm beginning to regret waking up this morning and thinking, "What the hell, I'll nuke the shit out of some weeds." FML
I agree, your life sucks 17 406
You deserved it 7 482

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Fuck yeah! Gardening inspires the shit out of me! That happens all the time. I wake up like, "Fuck you, aphids! I'm coming for you. Do you hear that, weeds? That's the sound of me coming after your sorry asses! I'm gonna pull you so fucking hard." And then I realise that I don't have a garden and I get all sad and stuff. True story.

Hey, at least you tried to tackle the job! Take a break and start back up later :)

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Hey, at least you tried to tackle the job! Take a break and start back up later :)

Gardens can be such pricks.

Aww shit... That wasn't meant to be a reply. Sorry for thread jacking... :l

You were #2 too. :p

LOL! I love the way you wrote that!

Oh no, time for another nuclear war. Or rather, Weed War 3.

2 - Cacti can be even bigger pricks.

Im guessing your not mexican.......

4: unless you're Mexican that joke is not okay...I'm sure most people wont be offended but I'm also sure that someone will be -_-

How does one puncture his or her hand while gardening? Btw hsballer OP is from Australia.

If you've been to Australia, you would see what a tough climate it is. 90% of the country is desert. It is very hot, dry and there is an unbelievable amount of weeds and pest animals (snakes, spiders, drop bears).

I asked "how" I didn't ask what the climate was.

How? Well because of the desert plants have to adapt to survive in dry conditions. They are lush and green like you would find in Europe. They're dry, hard and prickly. Prickly can cause punctures. Satisfied?

Link5794 18

Also, almost every living thing can kill you there, be it spiders, fish, or trees. Yes, trees. Eucalyptus trees have a tendency to explode under certain conditions, which can be met in Australia.

Explode? Well shit. I know what trees I'm not hiding under for shade.

57, I have never heard of exploding trees that is crazy if true. (googles) glad that my yard is mostly passionfruit vines. But if we don't mow our lawn enough we do get snakes and I live in the city so they really are everywhere.

Eucalyptus don't explode mate. Grass trees can semi-explode when cause on fire but not really.

Now I'm scared of my own country.

Thanks 89, won't lie I was a little bit concerned upon reading that.

Those damn drop bears!!

KU is gonna lose to Ohio State

fail, you're not even 3rd...

Gardens can be such pricks.

I see what you did there.

So nice you had to post it twice

I loved how OP said "nuke the shit out of some weeds".

I know how you feel op. I had to clear some stinging nettles out of my garden. Try getting some thicker gloves, wearing closed toe shoes, and jeans. You'll probably be really hot but maybe not as injured (:

No biggy OP you'll do better next time.

Fuck yeah! Gardening inspires the shit out of me! That happens all the time. I wake up like, "Fuck you, aphids! I'm coming for you. Do you hear that, weeds? That's the sound of me coming after your sorry asses! I'm gonna pull you so fucking hard." And then I realise that I don't have a garden and I get all sad and stuff. True story.

I know you're being sarcastic but the gardener in me has to give you a tip...the aphid's natural preditor is the ladybug. So if you have aphids (we used to get them all over our roses) go buy some ladybugs, you'd be surprised how many nurserys carry them, and put them on the infested plant(s). There you go, my longwinded, mostly useless, random tip of the day

You have officially made my shitty morning better! Thanks! :D

You're going to pull them so fucking hard? It's landscaping, not a porn film!

It can be both! There's a George Carlin skit in there.... Replace all instances of "kill" with "fuck" OK Sheriff. I'm gonna fuck you now... But I'm gonna fuck you slow.

This reminds me of "guerilla gardening"

Im relativly new to fml whats OP?

original poster, as in the person who wrote the fml. welcome.

Kat2812 is obviously confused. It stands for Oblong Poops. It's just a silly thing we call people around here. Welcome to FML!

The real defenition of OP is actually "Ordinary Pedophile".

It stands for Orangutan Pussy.

Nahh. These people are lying to you. It stands for Old Penis.

Obtuse Prick.

Orange people ????

Often paronomasia

Ordinary Pickle.

Obtuse porpoise.

How could be so mean to this newcomer? Lies, nothing but lies! OP= Overdue Period(s) Ex) Oh man, I hate OP!

OP : Obnoxious Protester. I got some OPs in front of Wall Street

You're all wrong, it means Oozing Pancreas.

It actually means Ogling Pedophile

No, it means obese people/person/persons. You decide!

Yeah those plants are pain enduceres

uhhh...inducers maybe? you were kinda close...

I never meant to post that, sorry. I tried to write something else but i typed it wrong.