By Baustigt - 28/03/2012 11:19 - Australia - Perth

Today, I learned that an inspired gardening spree is not as fulfilling as some would have us believe. One punctured hand, cactussed foot and bruised ankle later, I'm beginning to regret waking up this morning and thinking, "What the hell, I'll nuke the shit out of some weeds." FML
I agree, your life sucks 17 427
You deserved it 7 491

Top comments

**** yeah! Gardening inspires the shit out of me! That happens all the time. I wake up like, "**** you, aphids! I'm coming for you. Do you hear that, weeds? That's the sound of me coming after your sorry asses! I'm gonna pull you so ******* hard." And then I realise that I don't have a garden and I get all sad and stuff. True story.

Hey, at least you tried to tackle the job! Take a break and start back up later :)

Comments

Hey, at least you tried to tackle the job! Take a break and start back up later :)

hsbballer 1

Im guessing your not mexican.......

4: unless you're Mexican that joke is not okay...I'm sure most people wont be offended but I'm also sure that someone will be -_-

How does one puncture his or her hand while gardening? Btw hsballer OP is from Australia.

If you've been to Australia, you would see what a tough climate it is. 90% of the country is desert. It is very hot, dry and there is an unbelievable amount of weeds and pest animals (snakes, spiders, drop bears).

I asked "how" I didn't ask what the climate was.

How? Well because of the desert plants have to adapt to survive in dry conditions. They are lush and green like you would find in Europe. They're dry, hard and prickly. Prickly can cause punctures. Satisfied?

Link5794 18

Also, almost every living thing can kill you there, be it spiders, fish, or trees. Yes, trees. Eucalyptus trees have a tendency to explode under certain conditions, which can be met in Australia.

Explode? Well shit. I know what trees I'm not hiding under for shade.

57, I have never heard of exploding trees that is crazy if true. (googles) glad that my yard is mostly passionfruit vines. But if we don't mow our lawn enough we do get snakes and I live in the city so they really are everywhere.

Eucalyptus don't explode mate. Grass trees can semi-explode when cause on fire but not really.

Thanks 89, won't lie I was a little bit concerned upon reading that.

IDontKnow10101 14
monkeysareyummy 0

I loved how OP said "nuke the shit out of some weeds".

I know how you feel op. I had to clear some stinging nettles out of my garden. Try getting some thicker gloves, wearing closed toe shoes, and jeans. You'll probably be really hot but maybe not as injured (:

K_kanaka 26

No biggy OP you'll do better next time.

**** yeah! Gardening inspires the shit out of me! That happens all the time. I wake up like, "**** you, aphids! I'm coming for you. Do you hear that, weeds? That's the sound of me coming after your sorry asses! I'm gonna pull you so ******* hard." And then I realise that I don't have a garden and I get all sad and stuff. True story.

I know you're being sarcastic but the gardener in me has to give you a tip...the aphid's natural preditor is the ladybug. So if you have aphids (we used to get them all over our roses) go buy some ladybugs, you'd be surprised how many nurserys carry them, and put them on the infested plant(s). There you go, my longwinded, mostly useless, random tip of the day

You have officially made my shitty morning better! Thanks! :D

You're going to pull them so ******* hard? It's landscaping, not a **** film!

RedPillSucks 31

It can be both! There's a George Carlin skit in there.... Replace all instances of "kill" with "****" OK Sheriff. I'm gonna **** you now... But I'm gonna **** you slow.

The_Troller 14

This reminds me of "guerilla gardening"

original poster, as in the person who wrote the fml. welcome.

Kat2812 is obviously confused. It stands for Oblong Poops. It's just a silly thing we call people around here. Welcome to FML!

The real defenition of OP is actually "Ordinary Pedophile".

Nahh. These people are lying to you. It stands for Old Penis.

TheCaterpiller 6
TheCaterpiller 6
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

How could be so mean to this newcomer? Lies, nothing but lies! OP= Overdue Period(s) Ex) Oh man, I hate OP!

OP : Obnoxious Protester. I got some OPs in front of Wall Street

You're all wrong, it means Oozing Pancreas.

No, it means obese people/person/persons. You decide!

uhhh...inducers maybe? you were kinda close...

I never meant to post that, sorry. I tried to write something else but i typed it wrong.