Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML
Today, my drunk mom told me to apologize for being born. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML
Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML
Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML
Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
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Top comments
life_is_life 0
FYL
jbweesoo 0
wow i love how this has happened to me too multiple times yay for drunk moms!
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Comments (48)
mimimi_fml 0
FYL not because your mother told you that you had no life. FYL because you had to pick up your DRUNK MOTHER at a BAR.
mattmag 0
Lol #20, but it would work a lot better if you turned off your caps lock.
catryn 0
She'll be even more annoying when she comes out of rehab and finds Jesus, because once she comes out of rehab she'll be apologetic to the point of madness and then her new-found-religion will make her holier than thou. HI, MOM!
AnaMaree 0
She was drunk. She probably didn't mean it. Or at least probably didn't mean to say it.
life_is_life 0
FYL
blackfire_fml 0
How do you **** your life if you have don't have one? Lol
Nirah_fml 18
Wow, some of the people on here are dicks. I think that your FML is really about having to pick up your drunk mum (that is, if she's drunk often) in which case, I totally agree with you. The fact that she said what she said just adds insult to injury. So I feel sorry for you :( If this doesn't happen often, then yeah it kinda sucks that you had to pick your mum up, but I don't think it's a huge deal. People don't think about what they're saying when she's drunk, so I'm sure she didn't mean to sound offensive. It's a tough call. Depending on the circumstances this could be an FML or it could just be a minor inconvenience that you wanted to complain about (which everyone does, so I don't mean that offensively)
theoffkid 0
That sucks. Well, at least she won't get into a drunk driving accident, Designated Dave.
Phallus_fml 0
Drunk mum???
fuckurmotherANDu 0
ida slapped that bitch..she wouldnt remember and hittimg drunk people is funny as hell anyway