Today, I had to go into school for the third time this week because my son is claiming he's on bath salts and biting all his classmates. My son is 16. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML
Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML
Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML
Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML
Today, my doctor lectured me for 20 minutes about 'drug seeking behaviour' when I asked for more anti-anxiety medication. I need it because my shithead 15 year-old son found my pills and took them to get wasted. I need the meds in the first place because he's constantly pulling shit like this. FML
Today, my son is going through a rebellious phase. He's taken to wearing leather and chains, listening to death metal music all day in his room alone, and screaming at me in public places. He was fired from his part-time job for swearing at customers. My son is 29 years old. FML
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Top comments
dogpfcorn 11
Mother of god.....the zombies are coming
nikininja 4
He is lucky no one took him seriously and took a baseball bat to him!
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Comments (106)
skibutter 1
prepare for the zombie apocalypse
matt8992 3
What's even funnier. The guy who ate the other guys face off was not even on bath salts...fox news came out with a later report saying he never had bath salts. Only mrijuana.
UnluckyLolfire 15
#78: You'd actually believe a fox news story? There is a reason we call them Faux News you know.
RabidLimaBeans 16
Well while that's definitely true, 44, don't forget that its also a parent's responsibility to teach their kids right from wrong, responsibility, etc. so that when they aren't around, they don't do stupid shit like this. Especially since this is the third time it happened. One time wouldn't have been as bad if op would have disciplined their son properly after. Unfortunately, parents seem to be afraid of disciplining their children nowadays, so kids aren't learning how to behave properly
yeongji 31
.. third time in one week. I think it is about time you do something different with your son, or make him attend some kind of therapy. Just because he is 16 does not mean he cannot be immature.
fuzzydino321 9
16 yr old boys are usually immature, just talk some sense into him or take away his electronics
mrsmaglietta 6
dumb I hate teenage boys almost as much as I hate nope I got nothing they are just awful
juker369 7
He probably realized when he does that he gets to go home and play video games, or whack off, or what ever else 16 year old boys do. I bet he would quit if he didnt get to go home the next time he dos it.
SabyLuvsYuu 1
#miamiproblems
NovaNater 0
Haha, thats kinda funny but also stupid. How do people even get the urge to smoke/snort/eat/or shoot up new things every day?
someone3225 2
Hahaha jokes on you because bath salts are like most hard drugs and cannot be traced in your system after a while, that's why only marijuana was found!