I agree completely. My husband used to tear me open every time. Now we utilize lots of foreplay and if necessary, extra lube, and I make him start slow. There are always alternatives to the tearing without giving up on a sex life. I would suggest you sit down and talk with him about this and come up some solutions together. Trust me, if his options are slow down, use lube, etc. vs. no more sex... he will slow down and use lube. Don't give up OP, where there is a will there is a way!

If he's too big to fit in the ****** he's going to be too big to fit in the anus.

#334 as a woman, no one is too big for anal.

Only technically true. While the anus can be stretched a great deal, and safely if the appropriate amount of time is taken, if her ****** is too "tight" because the tissues lack the elasticity, then that's going to affect the anal muscles as well. Also, the time could be better spent utilizing other methods, such as a 55 gallon barrel of lube, foreplay, and thus to achieve the same eventual effect on her ******. Or surgery.

I cannot handle people calling...you know what... toys anymore, I mean little children play with toys, maybe it's just me but I'm seriously grossed out

During pregnancy, hormones that get everything all loose or set free in the expecting mother's body. It's what makes women's feet swell during pregnancy as well. My point is that we women can't stretch 10cm down there on a daily basis, so your first sentence is pretty much irrelevant. My completely non-medical opinion says that the rest is sound advice though. *crosses fingers and hopes that DocBastard doesn't chew me out for not having correct information*

50, I know, like calling pads "sanitary napkins"...I use napkins to wipe my mouth, ew gross!... Oh, right, that doesn't happen because I'm not a 5 year old. It's a word, and it isn't restricted to children's toys, in no way is it disgusting.

Yeah it's you. Grow up. Adults can play with toys too. The word toy means "an object for children or others to play with." Sex toys are something for 'OTHERS' to play with. If you have a significant other I feel bad for him/her because of your narrow minded ideas of sex toys.

50-You can't handle the term toys as a stand-in/catch-all for vibrators, ******, plugs, anal beads, **** rings, etc. but you also can't bring yourself to say their given names, instead saying "...you know what...". Perhaps the term toys is more appropriate, especially for your level of maturity, than you initially thought. And wow is it easier to say "toys" than to list all the options!

It's not stretching is just relaxation. The more uncomfortable she is about their sex (worried about tearing) the less she will be in to it and less likely to be sufficiently naturally lubricated. You have to take it slow and in time it will be easier to respond to the incoming girth.

My bet is if he's too big for the front, the back will NEVER work!

Not if he never gets to use it.

Don't just assume every get will cheat on their wife

Not everyone's a cheating spastic like you, Headcase.

You do realise that if her hubby gets a **** buddy he'd still be cheating.

49, No, that'd be an open relationship.

Downtime, it'd only be an open relationship if they had both discussed the possibility of separate **** buddies (obviously the wife would find one with a nice little penis) and were both completely ok with it. It either one had been pressured into agreeing to it, or were uncomfortable with the idea, then it'd still be cheating. Open relationships require a great deal of trust and (if you'll pardon the pun) openness. Although in general, I have to wonder whther OP has considered some sort of vaginal stretching. It's a pretty accomodating body part, and I reckon with the right exercises/foreplay/lube, the whole situation could be improved drastically. (Although maybe she should just talk the issue out with her doctor, who can give much more informed advice.)

What the ****!

I'd assume if she's letting him have a **** buddy then they've discussed it. If my girlfriend told me it would be fine for me to sleep around with other girls, despite her not feeling particularly comfortable about it, I certainly wouldn't accept being labeled a cheater for doing something she gave me the ok to do...