Work: Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I... - FML

By apav - 11/06/2009 11:52 - Australia

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 892

You deserved it 24 406

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Contempt

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 21:59 - United States - Richmond

Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 422

You deserved it 1 583

By single again - 06/09/2013 00:29 - United States - Chico

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 112

You deserved it 5 295

By Bee - 08/06/2011 00:13 - Canada

Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 927

You deserved it 8 308

By mustanggt - 10/07/2012 15:39 - United States - La Porte

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 850

You deserved it 31 205

By anonymous - 09/10/2014 22:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while arriving to a date for the first time in a couple years, the first thing out of his mouth was, "I'm only dressed up because I had court today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 316

You deserved it 3 972

By thegrandchawhee - 29/08/2015 17:13 - United States - Yakima

Today, I was scheduled to fill in at the customer service counter where I work. Today was also the day that I allegedly accused a customer of being a thief, sold her a fraudulent money order, and will be sued for defamation of character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 043

You deserved it 1 807

By dumbblonde - 13/07/2019 00:31

Today, I figured out that the roommate who I let move in with me on Sunday is probably a prostitute. I’m a lawyer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 406

That ain't it

By Anonymous - 06/10/2022 13:30

Today, my tampon leaked right before I had to go to court. I'm the plaintiff and I work for my city, and blood stains isn't a good look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 281

You deserved it 131

By convict possibly - 26/05/2017 18:00

Today, I got to try on a stunning suit that made me the handsomest man in the world. Upcoming prom? No. Wedding? No. I attended a date... A court date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 384

You deserved it 2 085

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 196

You deserved it 2 572

Next

Top comments

redbluegreen 40

Thursday 11 June 2009 16:06

Priceless. But depending on the case, there is a small possibility, you were still correct.

OppositesAttract_fml 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 16:03

Nice. XD FYL, but it's not your fault, we all mess up sometimes like that. ;P

Comments

thezoramonster 0

Friday 12 June 2009 2:22

might be time to consider a different career. alpaca farming, for instance.

cattoe7 0

Friday 12 June 2009 2:36

well maybe she was.. sooo maybe you were right hmmmmm...

_DumbAZz_ 0

Friday 12 June 2009 2:55

I'm sure it happens to everyone. :3

Dunbar00 1

Friday 12 June 2009 2:59

HAHA Freudian slip perhaps

letthemxeatcake 0

Friday 12 June 2009 3:21

ROFL

candii_fml 0

Friday 12 June 2009 3:33

hahahahahaaha ohh wooww im sorry FYL but thats hillarious :) if i need a lawyer make sure i hire you for sure :D (im bein serious not insultin there ) ^

domii_fml 0

Friday 12 June 2009 3:52

LMAO LMAO

ithedarkknight 0

Friday 12 June 2009 3:59

Planning what your going to do after work already??? I MEAN COME ON WAIT TILL YOU LEAVE THE OFFICE SHEESH!

aquarius6 0

Friday 12 June 2009 4:02

Funny !!!!!!!

sofiesmurf 0

Friday 12 June 2009 4:23

HAHAHAHA I'VE DONE EXACTLY THE SAME THING

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Today, I arranged a romantic dinner for my boyfriend. His favourite meal, fresh flowers, scented candles. Everything went beautifully, at least until he wrapped an arm around me and whispered, "Want some dick?" into my ear. Mood horrifically ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 876

You deserved it 7 381

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 909

You deserved it 281

Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 954

You deserved it 5 042

Today, after I divorced my husband because of his extreme alcoholism, he's now sober and got his life together and I see the man I fell madly in love with. Apparently, getting better for revenge meant more than getting better for the marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 219

Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 607

You deserved it 3 901

Today, I had to stop on a long trip to use the restroom at a gas station. Apparently, there was water damage beneath the toilet, because after about two minutes of doing my business, it collapsed about seven inches beneath the floor. Guess who got covered in water, black mold, and poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 929

You deserved it 386

Today my daughter asked me to do her a huge favor : undergo a liposuction transplantation where my fat would be sucked out then put into her butt and thighs. Apparently, I am the fattest DNA match to her, lessening the risk of her rejecting the transplant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 678

You deserved it 1 151