Did you vomit in the oven?

I, too, just read the previous FML.

To anyone in the future, a previous FML involved vomit in the oven

They will stay in the same order, unless they're going through random FMLs, and I'm sure everyone can guess that it's a reference to another FML.

Following day, comes to class with a mullet.

you should show up with a pillow under your shirt just to see their reaction towards your quickly grown belly.

"Wow that was fast"

OP will respond with, "If you think that's fast, you should have seen how I got into this predicament. Worst 45 seconds of my life!"

Well that escalated quickly

"It's a vampire-human baby."

#31 Can you not?

At least you get to miss school... I broke my arm and still had to go to school

I think she's still went/going because her mom said she'd be late.

You can live with a broken arm. People go to school with broken arms all the time.

It's not about you.

#20 How is that relevant?

Very unfortunate wording. I hope you get feeling better and clear things up with your teachers.

at least you didn't vomit in school.

I can see your mom doesn't care about the puking or dying rule for letting you stay home. Feel better OP.

Sick this morning may have been more appropriate phrasing.

Look on the bright side, it's a two for one in terms of days off school... Today you get to miss for morning sickness, and tomorrow you get to miss class when the school counselor inevitably asks to see you in their office.

Juno it's always scandalous if a student gets pregnant.

The real FML should be all the awkward talks that happened the following day. .