Miscellaneous: Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no...

By SugarMyBalls - 19/12/2012 23:31 - United States - Winder

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 531

You deserved it 3 152

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/03/2015 19:54 - United States - Wheaton

Today, my girlfriend hasn't spoken to me in a week, so I gave her a call. No reply. I texted her, and got a text back saying: "Sorry, dude. Better luck next time!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 188

You deserved it 2 537

Text arguments are the worst

By Anonymous - 14/08/2022 10:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was upset with my girlfriend, but I didn't want to start an argument with her, so I didn't reply to her message immediately. She asked me what happened. I hesitated but explained nonetheless. She remained silent for almost an hour before replying she's busy at work, so she can't reply. Then why did she even bother to ask? FML

I agree, your life sucks 712

You deserved it 207

By dumbass - 01/10/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 760

You deserved it 5 869

By UnfortunatelySingle - 21/07/2015 06:15 - United States - Portland

Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 429

You deserved it 3 377

By Nox - 06/01/2010 07:25 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 565

You deserved it 7 691

Help

By whyme - 08/12/2010 06:26

Today, feeling so depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts, I texted a girl I had a crush on. Her response? "Can you please delete my number, you're getting annoying." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 505

You deserved it 19 788

By JennyAndrews - 05/12/2009 08:44 - United Arab Emirates

Today, I was texting this cute guy that I like. After a couple of minutes I get a missed call from him, I call back and his girlfriend answers and says "Hi this is his girlfriend, please stop calling him". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 167

You deserved it 31 102

By Desperate_measures - 16/01/2010 12:22 - Greece

Today, I got a text from my crush. In my clumsy attempt to quickly grab the phone, I knocked it off the kitchen counter and cracked the screen. After driving to my friend's house so I could put my sim card in her phone, I saw that the text said, "Who is this? Stop texting me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 090

You deserved it 14 747

By generic_name123 - 09/03/2015 13:55 - United States - Washington

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 607

You deserved it 3 355

By Anonymous - 12/09/2012 21:06 - United States

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 469

You deserved it 4 346

KickItHigh 32

Thursday 20 December 2012 8:16

At least your best friend is being honest and not going behind your back.

Dixbfloppin 11

Thursday 20 December 2012 8:15

Dump that botch.

Comments

seandoc 13

Thursday 20 December 2012 21:14

What's up with the title?

xmaximusx 12

Thursday 20 December 2012 22:05

Hoe

Spottedfeather 7

Thursday 20 December 2012 22:26

You're a guy, I presume. So...why were you texting ?

sesor 7

Thursday 20 December 2012 22:36

At least your mate said something...

paprika_pilipili_fml 14

Thursday 20 December 2012 23:26

What a hoe !

CynicalWolf 9

Thursday 20 December 2012 23:31

I think it's time to have a good chat with your girlfriend about her intentions, if she has more time for him then you.

Snowcones 14

Friday 21 December 2012 0:19

You should probably consider reading his texts... if he lets you

sectorleader 2

Friday 21 December 2012 0:44

You've got a good friend at least. Dump the chick.

BananerzFresh 12

Friday 21 December 2012 1:05

Your best friend is a keeper. Your gf not so much.

xKites 4

Friday 21 December 2012 1:49

You should've pretended your best friend was next to you and is reciting everything that she just sent him.

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The Top

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said, "You know? I like little girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 359

You deserved it 61 100

Today, we were supposed to go on a weekend camping trip with our Scout troop. On Thursday I wasn't feeling well but I made it through school okay. Dad forced me to pack up immediately after school, even though I felt worse. I threw up on the porch on the way out. Dad thinks I did this on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 46

The Top

Today, I had to buy a new vacuum cleaner. My previous one stopped working, because apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to suck up our puppy's shit from the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 507

You deserved it 2 505

Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 307

You deserved it 5 123

Today, my girlfriend of a month told me that the only thing keeping her from swallowing a bottle of pills is being in a relationship with me, because she doesn't handle breakups well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 568

You deserved it 3 034

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 443

You deserved it 5 783

Today, I told my dad that I had a herpes infection. He said, "Good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 429

You deserved it 38 227

Today, while shopping, I tried on a beautiful knee-length dress. It looked amazing and I decided to buy it, until the time came to take it off. A jammed zip meant 15 minutes of tugging before the manager cut me free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 554

You deserved it 349

Same thing different taste

Text arguments are the worst

Help

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