By damn - 04/01/2013 14:08 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 194
You deserved it 7 336

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Grab the flowers and slam the door. Good riddens.


ryry013 6

Wow he's a douche. Unless he expected to stay long, flowers are like a slap in the face.

Hopefully the other girl rejects him and throws him into the friendzone..

Fine, I'll be the guy. You're* I would say off*, but that could be a simple typo.

syley 5

Was I the only one that thought the flowers were for his friend as an apology for his girlfriends over-reaction and he dumped his girlfriend cause of how paranoid she seemed. Maybe this was only my thought, but I really do think it's a possibility.

Hopefully he doesn't even get put in the "friendzone". Hopefully the other girl realizes what an assclown this guy is and rejects him and his friendship entirely. Though that might be wishful thinking.

#38: It's not really paranoia since he ended up breaking up with the OP in favor of the "friend".

syley 5

Well if my significant other were to question my relationship with one of my best friends of the opposite sex I would feel as though she didn't trust me. Not hard to go from there to break up time. Again this might just be me though.

I agree wholeheartedly, but the manner it was done in is what makes him a douchebag, in my opinion.

X_Codes 11

@76 - I wouldn't be so sure. When people get in a fight, they try to cast themselves in the best possible light and the other person they were fighting with in the worst. If OP said anything along the lines of "either stay away from her or we're done," then she totally deserves this.

38, this is what I was thinking, to be honest. some girls can't handle their boyfriend having a close female friend and I'm thinking that it simply didn't work out in this case.

He could have left the flowers in the car but I agree the OP was being paranoid, jealous and unfair, so she deserved it

Se never said he was hooking up with the friend or getting into a relationship with the friend in fact even as a slighted ex she just says a close friend ... I think OP realizes that she was wrong maybe the flowers were an apology for the friend for all we know OP had harassed the friend or the guy may be saying you think I'm doing it you accuse me of it so I'm going to see what happens if I really do go on a date with her.

I agree 38. As far as I'm concerned, OP deserves it

Eh, I was in a 5 year relationship with a guy and I was never comfortable about one of his "friendships" with a girl he was *very* close to. A change in employment forced me to move halfway across the country, at which point they moved in together while he and I were still dating (he told me about this after we broke up) and now they're dating. So no, sometimes the paranoia is completely justified.

He is better off with out her. If my girlfriend freaked out just because i was friends with other girls , i would dump her too. Just because u are in a relationship and friends with another girl does not mean you are cheating.

Grab the flowers and slam the door. Good riddens.

It makes you wonder how close they actually were, if the flowers are for her.

I hate being a grammar nazi but it really is bugging me. Riddance* I know it really doesn't matter, my OCD was just killing me, sorry.

I like to think of it as being a slight perfectionist rather than having OCD.

everybody has ocd nowadays. it's "a hype" and will blow over..

RpiesSPIES 27

You're confusing with OCD wi... Oh look a penny... Oh wait... Where was I? Oh ya, You confused it w...

Wow that's terrible! Don't worry, I'm sure it just wasn't meant to be.

I sure hope it wasn't meant to be or Cupid is really ****** up nowadays

Look on the bright side, at least it's over. Obviously she was who he wanted to be with and in the end you were just going to get hurt, be thankful it's over now as opposed to later.

Curious about that name lol was a sonar tech nuke subs in the navy

I lost plenty of girlfriends for my homegirl and I don't miss any one of them. My homegirl been there through all my ups and downs, before I ever even had a girlfriend and she is still here. I wouldn't choose any girlfriend over her.

So, why aren't you dating "homegirl"?

yoursucklives 36

then i hope you don't miss out on your true love because you choose your homegirl over her.

13 this goes into the friendzone conversation. Girl has awesome guy friend but doesn't see him as the super awesome boyfriend. Guy has awesome lady friend but doesn't see her as anything more...well I'm sure he is friendzoned by her too....nvm.

Just because a guy is close friends with a girl doesn't mean there is any sort if love interest, and even if there was, it shouldn't be considered unacceptable for someone to be friend zoned. If a girl/boy doesn't want to date their best friend because they're not attracted to them, so be it. It's much nicer to friend zone people rather than break their heart later on.

By friend-zoning people you could in fact be breaking their heart. It's pretty much a lose-lose situation for the person being friend-zoned.

Hey dude I'm sleeping with "homegirl" behind your back

If everyone most know. I knew her since I was nine, we have been through everything and I mean everything her mom was there when my mother left me and her mom took me in and raised me as her son. I was there when her mom caught cancer and was there every step of her recovery. I was there while her brother discovered he was gay and caught H.I.V. I look at her and her family as my own and blood would not make us any closer. The reason I'm not dating her is because I'm too scared to lose her. There any other questions?

62- you have to be very sneaky and use a net.

62 - he's probably not a native english speaking person. In french we say : "attraper un cancer" which means literally catch a cancer. So be nice to us foreigners.

astralvagan 20

As long as they are truly just friends, there shouldn't be a problem.... I have a close fiend that my wife has met an knows it's just platonic. If you're not comfortable with it, there are obviously trust issues you need to work on

My boyfriend had a girl he was friends with but I didn't trust HER. Turns out I was right cause she thought they were gonna get together knowing he was only in for a friendship and didn't have a girlfriend. Clearly she had a right to be on edge. My boyfriend and I had plenty of arguments about his crazy friend until he finally saw what I was seeing

17: Yeah the same kind of thing happened with me and my boyfriend. His friend's girlfriend has this weird little fixation on the idea that they were "a love lost" and she was always making eyes at him and acting resentfully towards me. She even attempted (and failed) to flirt with him in front of me and her boyfriend. We didn't argue as such but we did have a lot of frustrating conversations. He finally saw it when she threw herself at him when I was sat next to him. Poor sod never saw it coming, he was disgusted xD

I think OP's point was that he came to break up with her to be with the other girl.. clearly it wasn't just Platonic... so your comment is slightly off track.. just sayin

Yeah he finally saw it when she flipped out on him and was like "all guys do this to me! They screw me over!" Point being, people may think I have trust issues with him. Yes he cheated on me once and I do have some reservations sometimes but I trust him, I however trust my gut feeling when someone is throwing themselves at our boyfriend we usually pick up on it even when the guys don't

Bucketload of respect 6. Wouldn't it be awkward to see that guy hanging with your wife, considering he is your close fiend?

shouldn't matter who's hitting on your boyfriend. If you trusted him, you'd trust him to make the right decision and decline her advances. It's clear you don't though because otherwise you'd find it amusing that other women want your man but can't have him, or yo'd be flattered, or you would find your guy more desirable. However you saw her as a threat which means on some level you never trusted your boyfriend either

Actually the reason I did not like her is cause she always got him drunk or high and made him blow his money. I trusted him not to do anything, I did not trust her with everything she said to him. And he did turn her down multiple times before just ending the friendship when he saw how nuts she was

Who started the fight? I'm going to take a guess and say you. If he had any doubts about your relationship, you made those doubts become real in his mind and he dumped you. If they were just friends, maybe your jealousy made you push the subject too hard. Either way, you lost. Sorry.

Everyone is missing this... Clearly they weren't just friends if he's buying flowers for this girl, unless he's just a spiteful sob of a boy. They have something there, such as him thinking he has feelings for the other woman. OP picked up on that. She had a right to argue with him if he's now with the other girl.

26 - He probably did have feelings for her, but wouldn't act on them because he was happy with OP. You can be attracted to people while in a relationship and not even consider cheating. The argument with OP revealed that there were some trust issues and probably just made him reevaluate their relationship.

As a girl, I have to say that I completely agree. If OP was the one that picked the fight, she kind of had it coming. If you're constantly accusing sometime of cheating (which is what I presume happened, considering a breakup is never *really* out of the blue) then after a while, they're going to, because why not? A relationship is built on trust, and if you can't trust someone, your relationship is doomed. Nobody wants to date a person that is jealous and controlling, male or female.

As someone who has been cheated on, I know how difficult it is to see your partner close to someone else. There is such a thing as emotional cheating, you don't have to be in a physical affair for your partner to feel betrayed. After I was cheated on (physically) by my ex, I decided to stay with him because he was so remorseful and I really thought we could get through it, but after that I couldn't trust him to talk to any girl that wasn't me, and I felt like he cheated emotionally many times after that and actually did start dating someone who I had suspected he had feelings for after we broke up. What I'm trying to say is sometimes there are very good reasons to be jealous, and if OP felt like her boyfriend wasn't being completely honest about his relationship with his friend, then she had every right to confront him about it, and she was obviously right seeing as her boyfriend left her for his friend.

Please don't take this offensively, but if you're still harboring trust issues from previous relationships, you're probably not in a very good position to be in a new one, and again, I say that with only the best intentions. Still, I don't think there is ever a good reason to be jealous, even though I can see why someone would feel that way. If you're not totally healed of your past scars before you head into a new relationship, you're bringing some really toxic stuff along with you, and that's not the other person's fault or problem, nor should it be.

And, nowhere in this post did it say that he left her for his friend. He probably decided that if she was going to keep thinking that he was cheating, then he might as well just leave and be happy with someone else. I would've done the exact same thing in his place.

He left, and I don't blame him. We've established this. I've also already admitted that cheating leaves scars. That entire post was about the fact that you need to let those scars heal before going into a new relationship. It isn't rocket science to realize that you can't have a happy relationship if you aren't happy on your own. If you're truly committed to a person, those things shouldn't even be issues. And no, I wouldn't like to see my ex with flowers for another girl, but that also wouldn't be a problem for me because I wouldn't drive him away.

He doesn't deserve you OP, get out and go find a guy thats not full of himself. Unfortunately when it comes to us guys there are assholes....

There are assholes everywhere, not just with the guys. Who's to say she wasn't an asshole to him about the girl he was close to, so he decided OP wasn't worth it? The Narrator, or OP, isn't always reliable.

Absolutely! I'm ashamed of my gender sometimes when it comes to relationships, girls never seem to take the blame for this stuff. Yes, guys can be assholes, but girls can be bitches too. And everyone here is giving her sympathy for picking a fight with, and getting dumped by her boyfriend, who was apparently "too close," in her mind, to a female friend. What??? If I were the boy, I'd have done the same thing. Clearly the friend was a better option than OP, probably because she wasn't fighting tooth and nail to hang onto him. If a person feels suffocated, THEY WILL LEAVE YOU. It isn't rocket science.

SayPeanuts 29

Those poor flowers couldn't be left in the car. He would have needed to leave the window open so they could get fresh air. You always hear horror stories of flowers being left unattending in cars and suffocating. Oh wait that's children and animals...not flowers. What a dick.

RedPillSucks 31

The awkward moment when you realize that your argument caused him to reevaluate the relationship.