Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sent flowers to my ex, scheduled to be delivered after work in the evening. She texted me at midday thanking me for the flowers. I looked at my shipping order and they haven’t been sent yet. FML
Today, I found a note in my boyfriend's car from another girl telling him she hoped he liked the flowers. These were the same flowers he gave me while I was in the hospital, just after having his kid. FML
Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
Today, I found out that the money my husband said he loaned to his "mother" actually went to the purchase of new lingerie for the woman he's cheating on me with. I just got the bill from the department store. FML
Today, I called my husband and he told me that he was going to invite his friend Jeff over that night. I told him I would prefer that he didn't come over. He took it to mean that I wanted to spend time with him and came home with flowers. Then had to tell him I was leaving him. FML
Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML
Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML
Today, my girlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family. Instead of a happy reunion, I was terribly emasculated, publicly, for bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML
Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML
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Top comments
hottay7164 18
Leave his stuff outside for when he gets back/ yard sale and change the locks. Cheating sucks. If you are not happy just leave, but don't stay with the jerk, makes you just as bad.
Quaileggs 12
Send him a message or call saying "don't even bother coming home" and pack his shit up
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Comments (105)
brandoneyez1 25
Send him flowers with the gift tag that says ; these are for your girlfriend. Im done with you! He will surely catch on that you know.
avapaige1234 19
Never have sex with him. Ever again. You might just get herpes. Eww
WhiteCrimson 23
Kick him in the gonads and make a coffee date with her to find out if she knows about you. If she does, spill your coffee by accident on her lap and leave her with the bill. File for divorce, and let him walk with nothing, not even his under pants.
dutch_girl13 20
Here's an idea. Figure out where the "floozy" lives. Get to her house before your husband. Introduce yourself. Ask her questions like does she have a boyfriend and what he is like and his name. Then if the name is the same as your husband's, ask her to see a picture. To get the girl to do this you'll need to come across as nice and friendly. Time to practice your acting skills. Then ask her if she knew that he has a wife. If she says no tell her you are the wife, try stay with her until the guy arrives. That way you both can confront him. Then go out and kick his sorry butt onto the curb. And don't forget the divorce
kaiaslover 2
men are so dumb sometimes....welk alk the time...and men wonder why you women are moving up in the world sorry for you misfortune sincerely drue smith
KVanessa98 4
I feel so bad for u
BadassGinger 3
THAT ASSHOLE!!! LEAVE HIM WITH FLOWERS SAYING "Glad I'm rid of ur cheating ass"
lynnlove19 5
I am so sorry! Kick him to the curb'
BrownSuger_96 3
send his ***** a card saying after you get his flowers get ready for his nutts in a bag
ChuckNorris2 4
I'd have them change the card to say "I'm married by the way, and now my wife knows where you live"