Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
Today, I got married and my mom refused to be there because my dad, whose guts she hates, was there even though I promised repeatedly that I would keep them apart. I couldn't do the mother-son dance. She keeps insisting that it was a "lapse in judgment." Yeah, like we're really going to be able to have a do-over. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. When my soon-to-be-husband was saying his vows, he didn't say my name. He said his mother's. FML
Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML
Today, I was working as a caterer at a wedding when I congratulated the bride’s mom, saying, "You must be so proud of your daughter!" She responded, "I’m the bride." FML
Today, it was my wedding day. Three people showed up. My mom, my dad, and the priest. FML
Today, I got married to my girlfriend of three years. Her mother's Alzheimer's came into play at the wedding when she asked who I was. My bride-to-be couldn't stop crying. FML
Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML
Today, I went to the courthouse to apply for my marriage license and had my mother tag along with me. When I asked one of five security guards where to go, my mom looked at him and said,"You’re suppose to talk her out of it." Thanks, Mom. FML
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Top comments
Namenlos_fml 20
Wow.... your mother is a self-centered ****
allmidnighteyes 11
What the hell? Your mother claims to have bioluminescent properties?
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Comments (172)
skel_fml 0
Yo momma's so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on a scale.
vinegarChic 0
I can imagine my mum doing this one! but you'll be away from her soon on honeymoon- that's why you're getting married!
LOL97_fml 0
yo momma is so bitchy, she thinks her daughters wedding is her day to shine, not the daughters.
fuster 0
You should've sent your Mom over to me. I could have left her with a glossy finish. And who knows? You might have ended up with a new brother or sister in the process. That would be a win/win for you.
Pearljammer001 0
who are all these people? I've never seen half of these usernames?
samcele 0
why would she do that to you?! it's your wedding it's your day!
Pearljammer001 0
no one for yo momma jokes?
x_HELLo_tHERE_x 0
You want a yo mama joke.... fine. Yo mama so dumb she sits on the TV
MF12 0
and watches the couch!
singhjr96 0
yo mama so tupid she climbed over a glass wall to see what's on the other side.
SeasonedLemur 5
yo momma's so fat even bill gates couldn't pay for her liposuction
Hunts160 5
u should totally slap her in the face, ask her if her mother said that at her wedding, and tell her to **** off! then again she's prob single
cockamouse 0
your on FML on your wedding day???