By foreveralone - 01/12/2014 14:37 - Australia - Fitzroy

Today, I got friendzoned by three different women. Each girl suggested I should ask out one of the other two women who also friendzoned me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 240
You deserved it 10 888

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Rejected. The word you're looking for is rejected, and it's probably due to the fact that women are so interchangeable to you that you asked out three of them in just one day.

Is everyone ignoring the fact that he asked out 3 girls in one day?

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Sorry op /: you'll find somebody, don't worry (:

Is everyone ignoring the fact that OP asked out 3 girls in a day...

Well we don't know for sure if that was all done in a day. could of been a span of a week or even a month.

If that was the case, the FML should've read something like: "Today, I got friendzoned by the third woman I've asked out in a month," etc.

It kinda does say "Today"

.. And so does every single other fml they also end in ", FML"

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I'm still wondering why this comment got so many down votes.

Moe Syzlak from The Simpsons know your pain...

That's because all FMLs start with "today", it's a rule of the website...

Ouch, thrice in one day? I don't know what to tell you, man.

Your profile pic. It's all you need to say really.

sorry for being 'that guy', but why was this voted down so much? :S

For whatever reason, the FML community seems to champion helplessness in some instances. In this entry people who support OP get blasted with downvotes. This is because he had the courage to try three times. Had he given up after the first time, breaking into tears, people here would all go "Oh, you poor thing... Surely she's doing you a favor if she can't appreciate what a wonderful person you are!". The fact that he persisted in face of adversity, tried to win the affection of other people, disqualifies him. I believe this somehow ties back to how obsessed over sexual exclusivity this community is. Screw this guy for not committing to a relationship that doesn't even yet exist, right ;)?

Actually, it's downvoted because the OP is blaming the friend zone instead of considering the idea that maybe people don't want to go out with him because they don't like him in any way. Or maybe they're happy staying single.

Is that "actually" why it's being down voted 88? Or are you "actually" just hypothesizing like everyone else?

88 please point out where I blamed the "friendzone. " Oh right, I didn't. I only commented on how being rejected 3 times in one day would suck. The reason OP asked 3 different girls out in such a short time is a different matter entirely.

lol @ this ridiculous thread. I upvoted all of Bill Murray's posts. Bring it, haters!

100, 88 said "OP" blamed the friend zone, not you. Unless he used the term "OP" incorrectly.

Who down votes Bill Murray?

Strike one, two, and three. Sorry OP, work on your approach, and hopefully you'll score one day.

Trying to begin a relationship isn't a game.. You don't "score" by attaining targeted human.

It wasn't meant to be crude or anything like that. I started with a baseball joke/analogy and wanted to finish with one. I guess it wasn't any good.

#55: Then why is it called "scoring"?

#55: Then why is it called "scoring"?

#55: Then why is it called "scoring"?

Fun fact : the aphorism "Nice guys finish last" originally referred to baseball.

Aww don't worry there's someone out there for you!

I think OP's heard that exact sentence enough times, lately.

Is everyone ignoring the fact that he asked out 3 girls in one day?

And that they all knew about each other

They told him to ask the other out.

yeah, someone's desperate... go have a good hard think about your life and try again.

yeah man, op shouldn't just try to be in a relationship because of being in a relationship. he should wait for the right girl to come along.

And you're ignoring the possibility that he asked out one girl, she said no and suggested girl #2, girl #2 said no and suggested girl #3 and she ALSO said no?

The literal definition of desperate.

That's exactly the point. If that's exactly what happened, he asked out those girls BECAUSE THEY WERE SUGGESTED TO HIM. He didn't ask them out because he had feelings for them, oh no. He asked them out simply for the purpose of having a girlfriend. If he truly had any feelings for any of them, he wouldn't be able to just move on to the next girl like that. He's not the type of guy anyone should seek out in a relationship, and he's certainly not someone who should be pitied for being turned down.

It did not necessarely all happen on the same day. By convention, all FML's have to start with the word "today"...

Hey, you'll find someone better...which is a good thing! Forget about those girls!

They probably had it all planned out and were just messing with you... Don't get discouraged though, OP! You have to remember that some girls can be vicious for no reason sometimes.

i totally agree. how fuckin vicious to say no to someone you don't wanna date. like what the fuck. don't these girls know they're entitled to say yes, just because he asked? stupid

Really? I'm so glad you agree... If they set him up, to where they were just toying with him and his emotions, then that's what viscous. stupid.

You're the stupid one here. Just because no one wants to date him doesn't mean that there "vicious" or that they "planned it". No ones obligated to date someone they don't like. Calm your shit.

I just said stupid because she said it. I said "probably" and "if," meaning that they "could have" planned it to mess with OP. I never said that they have to say yes. "IF" they did set it up to where OP was turned down 3 times in a row, then that was mean. Not saying they did though. My shit is calm.

Rejected. The word you're looking for is rejected, and it's probably due to the fact that women are so interchangeable to you that you asked out three of them in just one day.

I'm glad someone said this. Everyone seems to be rushing to OP's defense when in actuality he kind of deserved it.

There we go! I had a scroll a bit to find it, but the logical post had to be somewhere in the comments section.

I agree, OP had it coming. If a woman you are REALLY interested in rejects you, you don't just go running to her friend, you try really hard to change her mind, i.e. being charming, chivalrous and attentive to her and her ALONE.

thank you! "friendzone" is so stupid. I'm fairly certain whenever a guy complains about this, the girl isn't trying to lead him on or anything.

@38 Actually, I LOVE the word friendzone. It's a pretty neat way to identify douchebags - if you think it exists, you're one of them. People who believe in the friendzone are people who need to assign blame. To them, 'rejection' damages their ego, so they use the term 'friendzone' to put the blame on the person rejecting them because they unfairly put them into a zone instead of considering them as a potential date.

@41 - And it's not like women don't perpetuate the myth or anything. Honestly, people doing the rejecting are usually terrible at being honest about their feelings. "I don't like this guy, how do I tell him I don't like him without hurting his feelings? OH, WAIT, I CAN TELL HIM HE'S JUST TOO GOOD OF A FRIEND TO RISK LOSING!" Yes, the "friendzone" is only a tool for entitled men to save face, but let's not forget it's also used to save face by the women who think men are too fragile to hear the truth.

#47 I'm assuming you never had to reject someone who was interested in you. Even if it's a complete stranger, unless you're an asshole it's a pretty hard thing to do to someone because you KNOW you're going to hurt their feelings no matter how you phrase it. If everyone was painfully honest about it, the most likely thing you'd hear would be "Sorry, I don't find you sexually attractive." and that's pretty harsh. So a lot of people (men AND women alike) try to take the less hurtful route by saying "I don't see you as more than a friend.", which pretty much means the same thing.

#37, that's creepy as hell. A woman says no, you respect her decision and move on. This isn't a rom-com, you don't win the girl by pestering her until she gives in.

Not to be confused with being a stalker, jealous and rude.

Wow. Your faith in humanity is astounding to 'know' that a logical comment must exist!

#47. I think much of the negativity against the word 'friendzone' (and its variants) stems from misuse of the term. Assuming the FML is the whole of the story, it doesn't meet the definition. OP doesn't mention any of these ladies stringing him along for money, companionship, yardwork, etc. He only states that he asked and they turned him down. Does friendzoning exist? Yes. I've seen it. I've also seen the term used as an excuse for poor behavior and to milk sympathy for people who are incredulous that they have been rejected. People get rejected. Ugly people, pretty people, nice people, assholes - we all get rejected. Being turned down isn't the same as being friendzoned - you can be turned down without being used. Learning to accept rejection with grace is a mark of maturity.

99% of the time, friend zone is a word disappointed guys use to make it sound like they didn't get rejected. If the girl has a boyfriend, that's more of a friend zone, so to speak.

lol at 86. "stringing him along for yard work" how much yardwork could one possibly have

@63 - It's really not that hard to say, "Sorry, I don't feel the same way" or "I appreciate the thought, but no thank you". What happened to "you're not my type"? I guess using those makes me heartless because I don't try to sugarcoat things when I reject somebody.

The world he is looking for is "politically-correct rejected". If you're saying to someone: "You're a really nice person but I can't date you because I know you too much and you are my friend" you have not really explained why you are rejecting the person. And this can leave a sentiment of frustration.

DING DING DING DING DING! We have a winner! I think most guys who claim they landed in the "friendzone" are fucking creeps who the girl just told "let's just be friends" because it's less scary than the alternative of saying "you're a creep" and spending the rest of her life worrying that he'll stalk, rape, and kill her. And I'm speaking as a guy who has been rejected, and deserved it.

105, ummmm, I hate to break it to you, but "I don't see you as anything but a friend/I prefer you as a friend/I don't want our relationship to change" actually *is* a perfectly rational explanation, and you are a bit of an asshole for feeling otherwise entitled to an intimate relationship. Sometimes you make a better friend than lover, and attempting to force it into a romantic or sexual relationship is creepy af

Holy shit ^^^ THIS *high five for saying it*

52 and 69: I didn't mean "try to change her mind" by being a loitering pest, follow her around wherever she goes and ask her out every day until she says yes, but since they seem to be friends or at least run in the same social circle, he could just be really attentive to her and make her feel special in a totally non-creepy way. And maybe, possibly, being wooed that way could lead to her changing her mind. Or not. But then at least he put a real effort in and she knows he was being genuine. I'm a woman myself. If an aquaintance asked me out out of the blue and then went to my friends too, I wouldn't think the guy had any real interest in me as a person, only in someone possibly filling in the empty "girlfriend" position. If instead he made an effort to get to know me better and being really chivarous and attentive (being able to hold a longer conversation, noticing my empty glass and offering to get me something from the bar, remembering my hobbies and interests and surprise me with a little token in relation to them some other time) would make me feel special and interesting and would in turn make it more likely that I could be interested in a relationship with that guy.

No, you don't. You respect her answer and move on. If you're willing to try to change her mind about her no here, where else would you do it? How can she trust you to respect anything she says? Would you try to pressure her into sex if she clearly didn't want to have it?

Your First paragraph is the very definition of being the "nice" person in a friendzone. A no should be respected.

There's no one opinion on this. I've seen several relationships start as friendships, where He was persistent and She wanted to keep him as a friend (note about this: if you'd help someone move (or with homework or what have you), but, if you're being honest, you wouldn't expect them to return the favor (in the same way) chances are you're NOT friends.) On the other hand, I've heard enough stories about "that stalker, [Name], who won't leave me alone".

look everyone a social justice warrior

#149 Seeing as she suggested for him to go to her friends and he did, she probably doesn't think he is really interested in her. Wooing her should ensure that she does know he is sincere within a couple of weeks. If then, with that knowledge, she still says no, then of course he should respect that and move on, not persue her for months or years.

It's almost impressive. They probably all planned on doing just that to you. Don't worry bud. You'll find someone.

I know how you feel op. but I think this is a perfect opportunity to focus on other important goals in life. Those who push for a relationship that shouldn't be, often just hurt themselves.

#14.How did such a reasonable comment get so downvoted?

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Maybe the better question would be then what are you doing in those minutes of meeting you they decide that? They might just not find you attractive,not like your sense of humor,not looking or any number of reasons. If disappointment about getting turned down in a few min is a thing maybe you've gotten a reputation for considering every woman as a potential option and that's been passed around through friends.

Maybe op shouldn't have asked out three girls who all apparently knew each other the same day. Sounds like he's more interested in being in a relationship than who he's in a relationship with. I dated someone like that, it sucked.

Look. I'm not blaming anyone for friend-zoning me. But I am saying the friend zone sucks. People have every right to reject or accept whoever they want.