Health: Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

By Anonymous - 12/05/2011 07:54

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 501

You deserved it 5 689

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Same thing different taste

By irony - 16/08/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 940

You deserved it 9 362

By Anonymous - 09/06/2011 16:35 - United States

Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 311

You deserved it 6 045

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 17:11 - Germany

Today, as I passed a printout over my shoulder to my mum, I managed to give myself a papercut on my tear duct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 649

You deserved it 2 684

By Moon_Glade - 03/06/2017 16:00

Today, at work, I have discovered the wonderful feeling of having a paper cut, with metal, under your nail, on all your nails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 972

You deserved it 359

By AHHH_REPTAR - 23/06/2016 04:54 - United States - Spearfish

Today, while drilling holes in "No Smoking" signs for my job, I gave myself a minor cut that would appear to most as a papercut. I then had to fill out 3 double-sided pages of paperwork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 629

You deserved it 1 392

About that…

By Insensitive - 14/11/2009 22:26 - Australia

Today, I sent a get well card to my friend. it wasn't until after I got home from posting it did I realise that the stamps I put on the envelope had the phrase "Let's Get Active" on them with drawings of people playing sports. My friend is in a wheelchair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 119

You deserved it 12 286

The ole paper cut excuse

By alliwantisabandaid - 11/02/2011 08:27

Today, I cut my finger deep on an envelope at work and started bleeding profusely. When I asked my co-worker for a band-aid, she told me to get back to work and stop making up excuses to try and hit on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 242

You deserved it 3 974

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 983

You deserved it 8 237

ER time

By sero - 10/08/2022 04:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I cut my hand on nothing while at work. It bled so much, I began to feel woozy, and everyone kept brushing me off when I asked where the first aid kits were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 120

By caitywebbkid - 11/12/2016 15:56 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was cutting some paper when I accidentally cut a sizeable chunk out of my finger. I went to my car to get my bumbag (I'm a lifeguard) so I could patch it up. I then promptly got a large piece of glass in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 788

You deserved it 812

iAmScrubs 19

Thursday 12 May 2011 15:57

The people who sent it are out to get you. Tomorrow, you will receive roses and cut yourself on them too.

LaughterofCorn 4

Thursday 12 May 2011 15:58

oh the irony :)

Comments

mariapelaez 0

Friday 13 May 2011 4:52

ironic..

victo890 11

Friday 13 May 2011 4:58

probably the person who gave you the card did that on purpose. LOL

cristalx33 0

Friday 13 May 2011 5:10

lmaoo the irony

CoolAidIsMyName 0

Friday 13 May 2011 5:44

irony. it kills me.

hurray4jmk 1

Friday 13 May 2011 6:22

First world problem. STFU.

SpikedKnuckles 8

Friday 13 May 2011 6:48

the irony..

DeLpHe3zY 7

Friday 13 May 2011 7:46

haha then the next time the card cuts his face or something :p

cheerbaby05 0

Friday 13 May 2011 7:48

Ironic:)

shmiglybottom 0

Friday 13 May 2011 9:39

that's not an fml.... that's irony.

TsubasaOzora 0

Friday 13 May 2011 10:17

yeah.. get well soon.. FYL !

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The Top

Today, I had to spend at least 30 minutes, at 3 in the morning, shooting BBs at a mateless whip-poor-will to scare it off so I could sleep. It was making noise in a tree right outside my window. I feel for you my dude, but you're doing the equivalent of drunk texting an ex and crying into your beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 180

You deserved it 321

Today, my girlfriend won't stay over at my apartment anymore. Why? Because she saw a few roaches. Pest control comes every week and I spray every other day, so there's only so much I can about it. The worst part is now it's extremely difficult to spend time together because she lives with her mom and sister, who argue nonstop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 252

The Top

Today, I arrived at work at 8, and business was abnormally slow, but we assumed it would pick up. Few hours later, we had not had a single customer. As I walk out of the restaurant, I realize the open sign has been off all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 118

You deserved it 39 039

Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 231

You deserved it 2 012

Today, my mom wanted me to pick up my cousin from work immediately. I'm in my shirt and underwear with no other clothes and I'm also too young to drive. She said "He won't mind, and just take my drivers license, they'll never know!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 905

You deserved it 198

Today, I'm trying to sleep. If I fall asleep now, that's still four hours of sleep. My brain: "Enjoy this retrospective of assorted failures from your childhood through today! We now join the program already in progress." FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 134

Today, working in a liquor store, I had to tell a girl I couldn't sell her alcohol since she was severely intoxicated. She told me to "cash me ousside, how bow dat?" then smashed a bottle of wine and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 828

You deserved it 117

Today, a girl with her eyes glued to her phone bumped my arm going in the opposite direction on the sidewalk. She dropped her phone, chased me to the bus stop, and told everyone that I broke it. She threatened to call the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 156

You deserved it 218

Same thing different taste

About that…

The ole paper cut excuse

ER time

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