Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 4-year-old daughter stood up to a bully in the mall. I was the one who was getting bullied. FML
The Headmaster Ritual
Today, while picking my daughter up from school, I saw her being beaten by two boys while the teacher stood there doing nothing. I ran to help, but then she pushed one of the boys off her. The teacher then pulled her away, yelled at her and then yelled at me for "not raising my kid right." FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Fight Club Penguin
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML
Rough school
Today, my daughter admitted that she doesn’t have any friends at her elementary school. When I asked her why, she said it was because whenever she talks to any of the other kids, she gets punched in the face. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Kids will be kids
Today, I learned my son has been picking on a girl he has a crush on. He apparently went too far, because she finally snapped and beat him up at recess. The teacher, who knew about this from the beginning and actively did nothing, is trying to throw me under the bus for being oblivious to my son's behavior. FML
Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML
Whack-a-Mole
Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML
Top comments
BriBeHyper 2
What a badass.
RA661 8
Sign 'er up for boxing!
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Comments (202)
DarkCvengence 15
that's not an FML thats a win
HandOfRevan 6
my mom got the same call only i pulled a knife on the person
caliguy08 17
My nephew is 3 and he got in trouble for beating up another little boy at school. From what my brother tells me, my nephew was knocking the other kids head into a brick wall.