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if she's your best friend, why not approach her about it first? instead of directly going to the boyfriend
I'm guessing OP is not really her best friend. Even if indeed her "best friend" was cheating, OP had no business confronting the boyfriend without first reaching out to the "best friend". That's a betrayal on many levels and also raises questions as to OP's true intentions.
I agree. It doesn't seem right to go go him first, that's not something a friend would do. I voted that she deserved it.
Personally,friend or not cheating is wrong. The boyfriend had a right to know. What would have talking to the best friend do?
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Show it anywayI feel like I'm gonna be downvoted for that but I really don't think that OP's that girl's best friend. A friend maybe but a best friend ? Hell, I would help my best friend bury her bf's body if need be. And yes, I have been cheated on. But being someone's best friend is being something more than family, you can actually choose your best friend. I wasn't impressed when I found out my best friend was cheating on her boyfriend but I stood by her through it all anyway even after it blew right out to her face. A best friend isn't someone who's going to be judgmental and tell on you, I trust my best friend as much as I trust my brother and I would be very disppointed if she did something like that. Cheating isn't okay, but people make mistakes, sometimes you fall in love with the wrong person, sometimes life just happens, if you can't rely on your best friend to be the one person to tell you "ok, you screwed up big time, but it's ok, I'll still be there if you need me" then on who can you count ? I'm sorry for your friend, OP, she deserves better than you.
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Show it anywayI agree. Why is everyone being sympathetic toward her? OP was right to tell the boyfriend. Cheaters don't deserve a second chance, even if they're your best friend. Cheating is wrong and the other person in the relationship deserves to know about it. Good on you for trying OP!
Sorry, the whole 'burying a body' I hate. How can you help someone when you know they ended a life? They took a child, friend, maybe sibling or parent from someone and you want to help them? How ******* selfish can you people be? This doesn't sound like a one time thing, the boyfriend could be buying her shit, perhaps trying to get an engagement ring. The time spent with an unfaithful bitch could be spent finding his REAL love. But you people are fine with letting someone continue the relationship and waste time and money on someone who obviously doesn't love them because you selfishly worry over your own friendship. If the friend doesn't want to be with a monogamous relationship, she doesn't have to. She CHOSE to enter one and CHOSE to betray the person, they deserve to face what they did.
Is it just me or did any one else also think that maybe the FML was worded wrongly and it was meant to say that the boyfriend cheated on OP's best friend so that's why she confronted him? I say this because the word "confront" threw me off
you know she might have been really good friends with the boyfriend too? anyone thought about that?
#99 I agree with you 100%. If someone is truly your best friend, you would NEVER throw them under the bus like that. OP really deserves to have everyone think she is a shitty friend, and a home wrecker. I don't have a huge quantity of *close* friends, but the two that I consider my best friends..? Yeah, I would help them bury their bf's body before I would eat them out as a cheater. OP sounds young. Obviously she hasn't learned that bf's are usually just short term, but REAL friends are for life.
Christ, you're a terrible person. I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of the people attacking the OP are just overly defensive due to cheating of their own, or envious that the OP actually has a spine. Cheaters are absolute scum. Exposing stuff like this is a basic moral duty, and it's equally shocking and disgusting that there are so many hostile comments towards the OP. The only homewrecker here is the cheating girlfriend. Everyone here would want to be told if their partner was cheating on them, so cut the "u fucken snitch" crap, it's insulting to anyone with a brain.
Then at least you know to get checked out. If you have sex with someone cheating, you are open to getting diseases. Yet another reason it's so selfish to worry more about a friendship with a person who'd do it than the person it's happening to.
You look 12
My boyfriend cheated on me, I don't think his siblings knew but even if they had known and didn't tell me, I wouldn't have been mad at them, mad at my boyfriend yes but not at them. Of course you want to know if you're being cheated on but I would never blame anyone for not telling on their loved ones.
It's not up to OP to decide what's right or wrong in this relationship. Ultimately it's none of her business and she should have talked to her friend first if she was so outraged
it became OP business when someone told her and gave HER the proof of it. OP got stuck in the middle. OP is the one who then had to deal with keeping that on her mind. so yeah, you're right..it ISN'T her business..so why should she have to deal with keeping that secret?
#60 generally talking to your best friend and helping her get the courage to confess is the right thing to do. you don't go behind someone's back and betray them... its none of OP's business, she'd just got to help her best friend come clean and be honest
This sounds like something that just happened to my friend. What the ****?
Sylvia, is that you? You promised you wouldn't tell!
This is usually a lose-lose situation. Although, I don't know why you confronted the boyfriend instead of your best friend. She's the one cheating, and should be responsible for admitting the truth to her boyfriend.
I agree, it wasn't OP'S place to confront the boyfriend but rather her best friend.
#14: She would be a home-wrecker if that's the case. It would be a pretty low move going behind a best friend's back in an attempt to poach her boyfriend.
That's probably what people mean when they call her a home wrecker, it does seem an odd way to have gone about it
I'm wondering if op already talked to her friend about it and maybe gave one of those ultimatums, "if you don't tell, I will" and the best friend didn't tell? It's a long shot, but it would explain her going to the boyfriend. Or maybe op's really close to the boyfriend too?
I feel OP thought her best friend would try to deny everything and spread rumors as a cover up to save her relationship, and that's why she went to the boyfriend first as he'd be less biased. On the other hand, she didn't say how she found out about the cheating and she didn't mention any other friends helping with the cover up, so she probably caught her friend and hopefully talked to her about it.
Well I think you should've approached things differently op
Seems you confronted the wrong person first. It was probably seen as you trying to take him from her.
especially OP went as far as showing proof? it just seems like OP did a whole lot to show her best friends boyfriend he's getting cheated on
He'll find out the hard way. Ya can't say you didn't try but why didn't you go to your best friend first?
This is pretty serious, but I think you shouldn't go to her boyfriend for that. Seems kinda backstabby. If she's your best friend, I would try and understand her point of view first.
I understand what you mean but what point of view makes cheating ok?
To be fair, I don't think there's ever a situation with cheating where you can see the other person's point of view. It's cheating. It's not like there was anything the best friend could've said to make the cheating ok. I too think that op should've talked to the best friend first (and we don't know that she didn't), but she's not a bad person for telling the boyfriend the truth. I know I would want someone to tell me. For all we know she talked to her best friend and gave her the ultimatum that if she didn't tell the boyfriend than op would.
Sometimes being an honest and honorable person doesn't pay off. Nice guys finish last and all that bullshit. If you need an example of douche bags being winners always remember George Bush
What does he of all people have anything to do with the FML? Trying to inseminate politics into a subject that has nothing got do with politics in the first place?
Yeah at least you could've referenced Bill Clinton if we're talking inseminating. Pretty sure Dubya's clean in that regard.
What's up with all the cheaters around here?
Guess they can't handle it when someone does the right thing
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if she's your best friend, why not approach her about it first? instead of directly going to the boyfriend
This is usually a lose-lose situation. Although, I don't know why you confronted the boyfriend instead of your best friend. She's the one cheating, and should be responsible for admitting the truth to her boyfriend.