Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
Smooth.
Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML
Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML
Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML
Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
Top comments
Psych101 9
"I fell on it?"
LlamaUprising 10
Classy.
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Comments (419)
The_F3rris 11
When I need to use both my hands I stick my iPhone 4 up my ass too. Its convenient and not as uncomfortable as you might think.
TheOnlyX 11
Sounds shitty bro.
pmadNess 16
It was caused by the new maps system! The patient was just trying to find the main hiway! The maps took them down the Hershey.
8KAGE8 8
What in the actual hell..? What was he doing?!
Cainicide 5
Eeeeeeeewwww. He had sex with Siri...
Jjgibbs 5
He was trying to find the best wifi
Alex_5647 2
So that's why he was hearing voices coming from his ass! Who knew?
X_Codes 11
You know how some people post in the comments that there's another side to the story of an FML? Well, this time, there's definitely another side to this story.
AFEmoWifey 0
FYI: The Doc didn't keep the phone. It has gone to the pathology lab as a specimen. This is SOP in many facilities.
behnjymyn 3
Talk about butt-dialing...